The Lucky Leprechaun

How my worst break-up became my biggest blessing.

The lucky leprechaun chased me for years, as I ran from myself and my rough upbringing. Sheesh, I was too busy being independent, too busy making my family proud. Until, my family forever changed.

Grief was the only way in for him, and he knew it. My vulnerability held the door wide open for love-bombing.

Inseparable for 95 days straight after that first kiss, I counted. Why? The lucky leprechaun was my identity. Four-feet of my everything.

The lucky leprechaun’s life changed, of course — a broken Briâna followed. His goals, my goals. His life, my life.

152 days, 5 months. Long distance physically now, but more suffocated than ever. The leprechaun had to keep tabs,… (those exhausting hours on Facetime still haunt me — it never felt romantic).

I quit 2 jobs for the lucky leprechaun. To follow him, as he chased his dream.

The lucky leprechaun excelled in school and career, while I lost myself.

He was lucky, and I just wasn’t good enough.

The lucky leprechaun became even more lucky and began to highlight all of the flaws he once kissed and accepted.

• My hair wasn’t long enough (I hid the secret of pulling it out due to anxiety and grief).
• My health suddenly wasn’t good enough, how could the lucky leprechaun have kids with someone with eczema?