Jason’s Stay

“Coulton, I’m going to be straight with you,” I say as I step out of the bathroom. “I think Jason is a high-usage toilet paper user.” Coulton deadpans. “I just bought a new four-pack, like, less than a week ago. We’re halfway through the last roll now.” “It’s true,” Coulton admits, “I didn’t really take a lot of poops this weekend, either.”

“I don’t think Jason was taking an extraordinary number of poops, but… we definitely just went through a crazy amount of toilet paper,” I add. “You’re right. I’m going to say something to him.” “Are you sure, won’t he feel bad?” “No. I think he’ll just be pumped that we’re still talking about his stay.”