Working For the Narcissistic Abuser and How It Effects Your Mental Health!
Unfortunately, many of us have had to work for a narcissistic boss. We all remember the toll it had taken on our mental health.
I used to work for a supervisor that tortured me at work and I wasn’t his first victim. He had already given himself a bad reputation for being abusive in the past but he never really suffered any consequences because he was close friends with the owner of the company.
When I first met him, he seemed to be kind and acted as an adequate leader but it was only a facade. There was a day when he made advances toward me but I declined considering I already had a fiance and dating a supervisor always seemed like a bad idea to me anyway.
Another day I had asked him if I could run home to grab my antibiotics and come right back. He then told me that I needed to bring my prescription in to make sure it wasn’t a narcotic. I assured him it was only an antibiotic and I called him out as well. It was against policy for him to make me bring in my prescription.
He didn’t take too kindly to being rejected and standing up for myself. That’s where the trouble started and it didn’t help that I was shy and vulnerable.
What is considered workplace abuse and how it affected me.
Workplace abuse can consist of several things. Starting rumors, yelling, degrading remarks, aggressive facial expressions, intimidation through threats or verbal abuse, humiliating acts or comments and undermining someone’s work performance.
I noticed that after those negative interactions between my supervisor and me the workplace turned into a battlefield for me. One day he would be civil with me and the next he would be hostile toward me. He was unpredictable, this left me walking on eggshells throughout the day.
He eventually recruited what I like to call his, ‘little minions’. They would do most of his dirty work for him, continuously harassing me by yelling or talking to me like I was stupid. If I turned my back in the hallway they would make threatening comments so I couldn’t see who said it. I even had one male coworker threaten me in the parking lot. My concentration level went downhill because I was too busy trying to survive the abuse.
Eventually, my anxiety was so bad that I would have to give myself pep talks in the car before walking in the door. My heart would pound a thousand beats a minute and I felt extremely nauseous. The abuse that went on at work greatly impacted my home life as well. I was no longer myself! My anxiety quickly turned into depression and I began having suicidal thoughts.
The abuse went on for a while until I finally decided to put in a shift transfer even though it would put my husband on opposite shifts. My supervisor deliberately denied the request out of spite. That’s when I took the issue to HR and somehow my request was magically approved.
I have been on my new shift for a few months already and have no problems with my current supervisors. My anxiety and depression improved helping me to concentrate on my work and my home life now.
How to deal with workplace abuse.
Enduring workplace abuse from my narcissistic supervisor lowered my self-esteem and the emotional abuse greatly affected my well-being. So what can you do when it comes to battling workplace abuse?
If you can move to a different position where you don’t have to interact with the narcissistic supervisor then you could do that.
You could also take the problem higher and report them for workplace abuse.
When it comes down to it, your mental health is the most important. So that may mean swallowing your pride and searching for a new job with a better work environment.
If you are being abused in the workplace, always stand up for yourself no matter the outcome. And if you witness another coworker being mistreated then stand up for them as well. Nobody deserves to go to their place of employment and be abused! Please speak up!
