True beauty found in isolation

Social distancing has granted me ample alone time to self-examine and self-reflect, loosening me from the distractions and exigencies of normal everyday life. Unobstructed and undisturbed, I have received a stream of revelations — none bigger than discovering my true beauty and its source. Untethered from the scrutiny of others and no longer overshadowed by arbitrary social doctrines that base an individual’s worth strictly on their income and prestige within a well-defined career field, I’ve been able to drift into a peaceful, unpolluted mental state where I have observed my beauty unfurl before me.

I have been enlightened by the revelation that beauty is not found within your social network; rather, you find your beauty independently and then incorporate it into your social network. I was too deeply embedded in my social fabric to privately ponder my identity and purpose before the pandemic struck and consequently created significant physical separation between human beings. I was so scared of being a loose thread that I tried to adapt or reinvent myself to conform to others’ expectations — not considering the detrimental impact this would have on my happiness.

Now, in circumstances of virus-imposed isolation, I have embraced the space I desperately needed but never knew I needed. I run almost everyday — a form of exercise I scarcely engaged in prior to the enactment of social distancing protocols. I relish my time on the trails, and though, I’m neither the fastest nor most durable runner, the fresh air I inhale as my lungs heave purges my mind. Clarifying would be the most appropriate word to characterize my social distancing experience.

I realize I had it all backwards — as an artist and creative, the rules and principles on which society writ large operate will not benefit or nourish me. I cannot count on my social network to appreciate or validate my beauty because of my beauty’s inconsistency with prevailing notions and measures of status and success. However, by continuing to plug into my newfound, inimitable beauty and allowing it to guide my artistic expression, I can enhance and positively influence my social network in novel and transformative ways.