‘INSECURE’ Season 5 Episode 3 ‘Pressure, Okay?!’
After several iconic seasons, Issa Rae’s hit series ‘Insecure’ is in its final few episodes. Follow Culture Editor Bianca Gregg each week and she laughs, cries, and recaps all the things you need to know before the next episode airs.
Episode three of ‘Insecure’ explored the difficulties of co-parenting in one of the most realistic ways I have witnessed on television.
Maybe it’s because the story-line plays out among Black people and how we deal with this common subject in our community.
Maybe it’s because I am a mother and can recall what it was like dealing with my now husband as a first time father that lived 5 hours away.
Parts made me angry but there were parts that gave me that feeling of recalling certain pains of being alone in a time where you need a specific type of support.
The episode starts with the ascendance of Lawrence. He is now the one with some power in the workplace, as we watch him give the thumbs up and thumbs down to new tech innovators — a situation he was is not too far removed from. Lawrence is on a date at what appears to be a very posh restaurant. It is there that he finds out Condola has had his son, via text.
Lawrence arrives at the hospital and enters the room. Condola, her mother, played by Lela Rochon and sister, played by Keke Palmer, are already there with baby Elijah Mustafa Walker. Lawrence was not the most excited by the name but he was quickly overcome with proud new father joy while he held his son for the first time.
Lawrence stays with Chad during his visit and vents about the hospital experience and Elijah’s name. He admits the entire situation is not what he planned for himself when it came to having a child. Lawrence is present for the baby’s first doctor’s appointment and already the communication between mom and dad are horrible, when a discussion about Condola’s breastfeeding comes up. On their way out of the hospital, Lawrence discusses baptizing the baby and to his surprise Condola and her family have already planned the event. Lawrence asks her if this is how things will be with them, her controlling and planning every thing and leaving him in the dark.
Condola clearly has reservations about Lawrence’s lack of being present during her pregnancy however Lawrence promises to come every weekend to see his son.
Back in San Francisco, Lawrence has purchased a crib. He is feeling the weekend daddy thing. At the baptism, Lawrence’s Uncle Ronnie does the most in congratulating Lawrence on being a weekend father. He makes the attempt to get his son so he can bond with his parents but Condola is not willing to let go.
The following weekend arrives, Lawrence is supposed to come for the baby but he cancels due to a rough week at work. Condola’s sister rubs in the fact that Lawrence is nothing but a pop in and out daddy. She offers to keep the baby so Condola can get a massage.
Lawrence receives a text from Condola suggesting they go to baby Simone’s first birthday party together. When they arrive, Kelli is the hostess in charge. Lawrence makes the attempt to ask Kelli about “her friends” aka ISSA! Kelli responds by telling him everyone she is associated with is thriving in abundance, limitless!
I love me some Kelli because the assignment was understood.
Kelli’s God Mom speech was one for the books also.
Lawrence takes the baby to get something to eat and that causes an embarrassing blow up in front of the guests. Lawrence introduced solids to Elijah without consulting Condola and mess ensues until Derrick swoops in to clean up the situation. Derrick tells Lawrence he needs to be mindful of how he communicates with Condola but Lawrence feels that he is at least trying, which is more than some men. Derrick tells him the last thing he wants to do is add stress to the situation.
The following scene was the literal juxtaposition of father and mother, Monday through Friday. We see Lawrence popping bottles of champagne and having sex, Condola is dealing with the baby. In the midst of it all, Lawrence texts Condola to offer to take the baby overnight for the weekend. She accepts.
When Lawrence arrives, Elijah is extremely fussy. Condola refuses to allow Lawrence to soothe the baby and she begins to change her mind about Lawrence taking Elijah overnight. When Lawrence questions why she behaves like he can not take care of his child, Condola blurts out that she does not trust Lawrence. He is angered by the comment. Condola expresses that he is never there and he gets to play a part time father. Lawrence tells her that she never gives him a chance to be a father and that the situation is hard for him. Condola tells Lawrence she gave him a chance to be there but he moved away.
Lawrence reminds her it was for a job he had already taken before she blew his life up with the news she was pregnant, ouch!
He tells Condola she made a decision without him and now uses the decision as an excuse to keep Elijah from him. Lawrence tells Condola he will do whatever it takes to have his son, with or without her.
On the plane back home, the flight experiences some rough turbulence. The scary moment is seemingly a pause for Lawrence to reflect on the situation, prompting him to call Condola and apologize.
They admit the co-parenting situation at the moment is not working. Lawrence asks what should they do.
Takeaways:
What an episode! This was not an easy watch I think for most parents that have experienced the transition of becoming a parent and even more so parents that have to deal with a co-parenting situation.
“You blew up my life!” Man, those words were so harsh but it was Lawrence truth. “You aren’t even here!” That was Condola’s truth and both of their truths needed to be expressed to hopefully reach a point of healing and a healthy co-parenting relationship.
This could very well be the most difficult subjects to debate about because experience formulates narratives and I truly believe so many people could resonate with both Lawrence and Condola. Excellent episode.
