Divorcing Your ‘Non-Mum’ Friends…
WARNING: What I am about to say may sound a little controversial, so if you are of a sensitive disposition, sit down or turn away now.
I am not a baby person.
“What?!” I hear you cry. “But you are a mother!!”. Yes I know. I have two beautiful children. I chose to have two beautiful children and I love them dearly. But they are not my be all and end all.
They do not define me. This is a hard fact for some mums to swallow.
They find it a terrible, neglectful thing to say. “Oh but you don’t mean it!”. Yes, I do. I was never a person to fall over babies, even if I knew them, especially if I didn’t. I struggled (and still do) with the whole baby talk thing, the oohing and aahing, the clucking and poking. This does not make me dead inside or deny me the right to have babies. I am a good mum who shows her children a lot of love and affection, but I’m just not that interested in yours!
As I’ve said before, becoming a mum throws you in to a whole new existence. You are moving in circles you may not have necessarily moved in before and you tend to get pulled towards other mums, some who you will hate and some who will become friends for life. And thus your ‘non-mum’ friendships get thrown in to a stark light.
“Hey, didn’t we used to get pissed together and crawl about in each others vomit!?” Yeah, good times. Sigh. These days the only puke I’m covered in belongs to a teething ten month old….. They laugh nervously as they take a step back preparing to run home to their beautifully grown-up, non baby-stained urban loft. No wait! It’s still me! I’m still fun, I still go out. Sometimes. Don’t go….!!
I joke, but I get it. I have not been lost to the nether regions of baby land. I still exist outside of my kids, and I understand that some don’t want to talk babies incessantly. Hell, I don’t want to talk babies incessantly! For whatever reasons they are not there, through choice or chance, don’t fling these friends aside. I made an error once in letting a friendship drift due to my baby bubble-itis at the time. Don’t be hasty in signing the divorce papers, because when your children start to grow up and away from you, your friendships will hopefully be the relationships that stand the test of time.
Thanks for reading :)