My Daughter’s Doll Is Waaay Cooler Than Me
Last night, when the children had gone to bed, I was about to put away my daughter’s doll, Holly, when it struck me that she looked quite cool and sophisticated. So much so that I had a little longing in me for when I had the time, energy and money to put more effort into my everyday appearance.
It is a sobering realisation to discover that a doll in the playroom looks more polished and sophisticated than the lady of the house.
Now, don’t misunderstand me, I don’t smell or anything. I do shower and shave on a very regular basis. I also get dressed every day and not always in sportswear. It is the finer details of grooming and wardrobe finesse that are missing from my life since I had children.
Like my old wardrobe of clothes from Monsoon and Debenhams. Like my beautiful collection of handbags, currently stuffed with tissue paper and covered in dust bags, waiting patiently on the top shelf of the wardrobe for the day when they will once again be used. I shouldn’t even mention my disgraceful make-up bag. Once regularly updated with all the new hip and funky products, it is now a sad homage to what was in vogue several years ago.These days, I avoid make up halls in case I am asked to leave due to the amount of drool I would leave on the Urban Decay or Charlotte Tilbury counters. Finally, my jewellery. In fact, where is my jewellery box? It is so long since I wore any, I wouldn’t be too confident as to where I could find it.
So, last night, in the 60 seconds that it took me to pick up the doll, bring her to the playroom and put her away, I had thought of five reasons why she is waaay cooler and decidedly more put together than myself.
- You can’t see her roots
How nice it must be not to get roots! I have serious root envy! Recently, I slithered into the hairdressers on my belly in the hope I would not be noticed as it had been 16 (yes count them) weeks since I last had my roots done. Not being slight of build, I was indeed noticed slinking across the room but my hairdresser was gracious enough not to remark on the mammoth task ahead of her. Why 16 weeks you may ask? I had a job interview, otherwise it may have slid to 18 week old roots…. Mortified.
2. She fairly rocks those pearls.
In fairness, not every young girl can carry off a string of pearls, but this doll really rocks them. Right now, I’m the wrong side of 40 and so would not look hip or ironic wearing pearls and I would honestly be terrified if I did wear a set that someone might think I’m vintage and not in the cool, retro sense.
3. Her sunglasses are the correct shape and style for her face.
Because they didn’t come from a discount retailer! The dolls sunglasses were DESIGNED to suit her face. Any decent sunglasses that I have are locked away with the handbags. I can never find them when I want them. I swear, I prefer squinting at the sun anyway due to its irregular appearance. Vitamin D intake and all of that.
4. Her knees look great in a short skirt.
Mine don’t. I’ll just park that there.
5. The doll was dressed by my daughter.
If my daughter dressed me, she would do a much better job than I do. My wardrobe largely consists of jeans, leggings, hoodies, vest tops and long cardigans. Throw in a woolly hat, parka jacket and fluffy boots in winter and a pair of Cons in summer. Yep, the Mummy uniform. If my daughter had her way, I would wear a dress everyday with high heels, adorned by a full face of makeup and jewels.
Wearing a dress has become so rare that my daughter loudly comments when I put one on. It is just easier to be comfortable and I find I can move more quickly and easily in stretchy clothes. Last year myself, Himself and the two children were invited to a wedding and we all went looking only fabulous. My dress was fitted, accompanied by a hat set at a jaunty angle. My heels were high. My hair was coiffed to within an inch of it’s life and my makeup was on fleek. The net result meant that I was unable to keep up with, or catch the kids all day. For one day it was doable, but for now I will stick to the leggings and hoodies.
Still, all of this is part of family evolution, isn’t it? A few short years ago, I could hardly move without being vomited or shat upon. Those days are (largely) in the past. When I get dressed up now, I really appreciate the occasion and the process of getting ready.
However I still do envy Mum’s who look so elegant and well put together when I see them out and about. It got me thinking ‘Where do they get the time?’ and ‘Where am I going wrong here?’. Really, the only answer that I can come up with is that they make the time for themselves. That got me thinking.
Should I paint and shape my nails at night during the soaps instead of hoovering up the content of the biscuit tin? Should I take five minutes each day to implement a proper skin care regime instead of squirting moisturiser in my eyes and down my top whilst running out the door? Most importantly why am I not using my nice handbags?
I already know the answers to these questions and making a few small changes is not going to change the world but it might just change the way I feel about myself. My make up application and contouring certainly needs a bit of work so I should start there. Maybe I will practice on the doll.
