Member-only story

My Divorce Lasted 13 Wonderful Years Longer Than My Marriage

We sometimes joke about making it to fifty years without a single argument.

Kristi Keller
The Memoirist
4 min readApr 14, 2024

--

My marriage was comparable those whack celebrity unions that only last a few minutes. I googled “shortest celebrity marriages” and we were right on track with Pamela Anderson and Kidd Rock.

Our wedding date was New Years Eve 2005 and by April I knew it was over.

During our two years of dating before marriage, we were that couple. The couple everybody looks at and wishes they could be like. We were so in love that we always said if we ever split up, we’d have to be neighbors so we could continue “borrowing a cup of sugar” forever.

It was that good.

I remember one particular night during our courtship, we went bar-hopping and I drank too much. I spent the majority of the night inside a bathroom stall hurling my guts out. He stayed in the ladies room with me for hours holding my hair and rubbing my back.

In between heaves I could hear other women in the bathroom saying, “He’s been in there with her all night. What a good man.”

Indeed, he was. That’s the kind of man every woman dreams of, no? The man who has her back no matter how shamefully she behaves.

--

--

The Memoirist
The Memoirist

Published in The Memoirist

We exclusively publish memoirs: The creative stories unpacked from the nostalgic hope chests of our lives.

Kristi Keller
Kristi Keller

Written by Kristi Keller

Write like no one is reading, because it might be true. Never let the truth stand in the way of a good story. https://wildhoodwanted.substack.com/

Responses (11)