NYC Subways — love it or ?

Noemi Ergas Bitterman
The Memoirist
Published in
3 min readJan 16, 2022
Photo by Harry Gillen on Unsplash

NYC subways — love it, hate it, leave it or mourn it ?

The NYC subway has been part of my life since I was a child growing up in the 70’s. In my 20’s I decided that being immune to the smell of urine and filth on the subways was enough so when I met my ex-husband and he suggested we get married and move to Argentina I said YES to marrying him and moving down south.

Then in 2018 my son got accepted to the best special-ed school in Manhattan and I found myself loving the subway because of the pure excitement, joy and adventure my son and I were lucky to experience together everyday. My son’s sense of wonder every time we took the subway was so endearing to me that whatever negative feelings I had towards the subway transformed into pure love. My son and I rode the subway together home from school, to music class, to Hebrew school, to meet a friend, to go to Central Park and anywhere the subway would take us. The best part was when he and I would calculate how many subways we could take to get to a destination. “let’s take the 2 to Fulton, then switch to the A and so on”. The adventures we created daily are etched in our hearts.

Now, January 2021 and we no longer take the subway. I drive everywhere and it is nearly not as fun. Walking with my son towards our car we passed a subway grate and he asked me if we could stop to smell the subway. He went on to tell me how much he misses taking the subway with me and how he misses the smell and noise of the subway. My heart hurt for the loss. I am not sure when I will feel comfortable taking the subway again but I know I will cherish the years 2018–2020 when we rode the subway took every connection possible to get to where we needed to go and enjoyed every second if it despite the smell of urine and filth.

The subway also taught me manners. I remember my mother asking me to give up my seat more than once. I also asked my son on several occasions to give up his seat for someone with packages, an elderly person, or someone that seemed to need to sit. Many times others would see my child standing and say, here take my seat, but I would decline, my son would be fine holding on and knowing he did the right thing. I miss helping mothers with strollers up the steps, holding the door, smiling and sharing good vibes with others as my son called out the next stop and the connecting subways at that stop.

There are great people on the NYC subways. Despite the negativity seen on the news there is a lot of goodness and greatness in the NYC subway stations. I miss the subway and I hope to ride the subway again to continue the adventures my son and I love so much !

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Noemi Ergas Bitterman
The Memoirist

Much like Pablo Neruda, “I write, I write just to not die”