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Time Stopped After I Miscarried
I finally feel ready to talk about it
As I’ve begun to return to life and interacting with others, people keep asking how I’m doing. With complete honesty, I say, “Last week I started to feel human again.”
Though sincere, it’s certainly the glass-half-full version of the truth. The complete truth is that last week I finally started showering and brushing my teeth again. I’ve been able to do chores and open my email. I’m not rotting in bed anymore.
I don’t know how long I stayed in that space. Truthfully, I don’t even know how long it’s been since that heartbreaking day at the hospital when I got the news that I already felt was coming. For a while, I counted the days and weeks meticulously. Since then, time passed feels irrelevant.
The Nitty Gritty
With three days left of my birthday vacation to visit friends and family, I found myself in the emergency room. In the middle of a movie night, I was suddenly unable to move or talk. I was drooling all over myself. My friend Baylee called for help, and rode with me to the hospital as I screamed in agony from a basic IV.
By the time the ultrasound technician arrived, I had regained my mobility and coherence. Baylee held my hand as I navigated the discomfort. The tech said nothing but…
