Do You Need Others to Believe in You to Be Happy?
Oh, how we want validation from others.
We want our ideas to matter.
We want support for the actions we take.
We want people to believe in us.
But are those appropriate expectations?
The reality, plain and simple, is that most people are focusing on themselves.
It’s human nature.
So what do you do if all you want is for people to believe in you?
You keep reading to find out.
When People Think Your Ideas are Stupid
When I first started writing about mental health online years ago, there were plenty of people who thought I was wasting my time.
They shook their heads in disbelief.
They wanted me to spend more time on things that matter.
But here’s the kicker.
The things that mattered?
It mattered to them. Not me.
And that’s how it goes, doesn’t it?
People, even if they mean well, speak from their own life experiences.
They’ve had certain life events that have shaped them. Life experiences that you have not gone through.
So when others give advice, it has been shaped in the kiln of their own fiery turmoil.
So yes, I got a lot of negative feedback about how I was spending my time.
That continued when I started my first online mental health project, Nerve 10.
But you know what happened?
It’s true, it didn’t work out at first.
But then something happened.
I started to learn more about writing online. I started to find my voice. And others started to find me as my voice became clearer and more polished. They liked what I had to say, and I soon started to find my tribe online.
And as I learned lessons about what worked for me, I used my newfound knowledge on Twitter, on Facebook, and on any platform that seemed receptive to my views about shaping a new mental health paradigm.
I realized I didn’t need people to believe in me. I only needed to believe in myself — and then take action.
Action was all that mattered.
A Mentally Healthy Way to Ignore Naysayers
You likely have your own life areas in which people doubt you.
But do you need people to believe in you?
Is it a prerequisite for your success? Or is it just a “nice to have?”
You probably could just take action.
As long as you’re not harming yourself or someone else, what do you have to lose?
Action is the quickest path to learning.
Instead of thinking about how others will judge you, think about how you’ll judge yourself if you don’t start that blog, or write that poem, or make that call.
Whatever it is you’re putting off, you’re stalling on it for a reason.
And the reason probably has to do with your own self-doubt — NOT in what others think about you.
How can you start building your action snowball?
How can you roll it into a snow boulder?
It’s true what they say about momentum.
Once you’ve taken enough action, things start taking care of themselves.
Your actions beget more actions, and your life starts moving.
And I’ll say it again:
If it’s not harming you or other people, what do you truly have to lose?
Why haven’t you started yet?
Write down your reasons.
Once you see them on paper, you’ll probably realize that they aren’t good enough to hold you back.
Plus, they’re just words on paper.
Belief is internal; it stems from who you are.
Change who you are and your actions change as well.
Closing Thoughts
Here are some final things to think about.
Do you need others to believe in you to do what you want to do?
Do you?
You probably don’t.
You could probably get started and just see what happens — and then see what happens, again and again.
That’s how you build a life you can be proud of.
And it’s how you shed what you think you need so you can do what you truly want to do.