How To Make The Most Of Your Situation When Life Doesn’t Go According To Plan

Tony Fahkry
Oct 17, 2017 · 6 min read

A Well-Orchestrated Drama Of Unseen Influences

“Life doesn’t always go according to plan. Sometimes heading in a new direction can be scary until you realize you’re headed toward a new and exciting destination.” — Susan Gale

Letting go of pain serves as a reminder that life does not always go according to plan and your best intentions often will not eventuate as you hope.

Take a moment to reflect on a situation which failed to turn out as expected — imagine the details as best you can. There may have been an expected outcome you were wishing for. Perhaps you witnessed your well laid-out plans crumble before your very eyes.

The premise here is grounded in the knowledge you have the final say in life’s unfolding of events. In many ways, suffering is provoked by the assumption you have complete control over your life.

In his book The Five Things We Cannot Change, author David Richo suggests we reframe the notion of assuming control by adopting an alternative view, “We do not let go of control; we let go of the belief we have control.”

The five things we cannot change according to David Richo are depicted in the following conditions:

1. Everything changes and ends.

2. Things do not always go according to plan.

3. Life is not always fair.

4. Pain is a part of life.

5. People are not loving and loyal all the time

Determinist’s and fatalists concede there is a greater force working amid the backdrop of your life, which is beyond your perspective. You are a mere puppet in a well-orchestrated drama of unseen influences acting upon you. Whilst you have free will, ultimately you have very little control once the die is cast.

In the book Way of The Peaceful Warrior, Dan Millman cleverly highlights the analogy of detachment as a means of surrendering control, “…once aim is taken and the arrow is loosed from the bow, we can only wait in anticipation to see where it may land.”

The notion of control in an ever-changing and expanding universe is irrational in the context of outcomes. Those who seek control realise it is like chasing a stubborn cat. The more you chase the cat, the less likely you will catch it.

Through yielding to external forces you allow life to reveal herself through you, realising that every experience; every thought and emotion is in perfect alignment with the synchronous fulfilment of universal intelligence.

Be Willing To Transform Your Pain

“Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.” ― Allen Saunders

The realisation that bad things often happen are beyond the scope of understanding or reason. Yet to hold on to the pain would be to deny the life flowing through you, since resistance is likely to cause more suffering and pain.

Therefore, acceptance opens the gateway towards inner peace by allowing pain and suffering to pass through you, rather than remain imbedded in your mind and heart.

You need not be spiritually evolved to abide by universal forces. However, aligning with your heart invites you to become acquainted with the silent inner voice within, instead of the egoic mind. Connecting with your heart confers forgiveness is possible despite the belief you have been wronged against and deserving of revenge.

Forgiveness is conceivable when you learn to get out of your head and tune into your heart. It was Blaise Pascal who said, “The heart has its reasons which reason knows not.” He is reminding you the heart knows what the conscious mind does not.

In the West, the notion of surrender is met with a sense of hopelessness and vulnerability. It may also be construed for inaction and apathy. It is quite the opposite — letting go of how life should be allows you to consider there is a greater plan unfolding in the backdrop of your life which you may not fully understand just yet.

Surrendering control requires faith and trust. Faith that all your needs will be met once you have resolved to forgive yourself and others and be willing to transform the pain. The power of forgiving and your renewed enthusiasm towards life will reveal itself when the time is right.

How can this benevolent universe not honour looking after you? After all, if you are reading this, you have no doubt made it to this point as a result of the choices you made. You have handled every problem, disaster or tragedy and will continue to do so.

Faith is comparable to the inner knowing that your heart will pump oxygen-rich blood, with acute precision to your organs every day. You need not be concerned it will not perform its task or that it might oversupply the arteries and organs. It delivers more blood to your working muscles when you exercise and less blood when you are asleep. How does it sense the variation in activity? What is it connected to or receiving instructions in order to manage these resources?

Release Your Expectations

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” — Joseph Campbell

Infinite intelligence has the power and wisdom to function in perfect order and balance once you remove yourself from constructing drama in your life.

After all, life is subject to perpetual change based on the law of impermanence. Nothing remains the same, not even the cells in your body, which have a finite lifespan. Knowing this you can take refuge that inner transformation is inexorably linked to the human condition.

Rather than oppose it, learn to abide by it. The more you oppose life by holding on to the pain, the less control you have. The essence of this principle is contained in the following passage, “Life is like sand held in your hands. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers…”

Consequently, rather than clutch tightly, yield to the forces of life — go with the flow. Albeit, this does not imply complete resignation nor indifference. Rather it infers inner detachment.

If you feel an inner struggle to let go of your pain for fear of what will fill its place, release your expectation of the outcome by inviting a higher solution to permeate through your life. Rather than surrender to it, yield to life by allowing the situation to lead you where it needs to.

Author Susan Gale suggests that when life does not go according to plan, a new and exciting direction may be ahead of you, “Life doesn’t always go according to plan. Sometimes heading in a new direction can be scary until you realize you’re headed toward a new and exciting destination.”

Sometimes the wrong turn will deliver you to the right place if you are willing to let go of the pain.

Call To Action

To live a remarkable life, it is vital you take consistent action in spite of your fears and doubts. Download your FREE copy of my comprehensive eBook titled: NAVIGATE LIFE and embark upon your journey of greatness today!

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Tony Fahkry

Written by

Self-empowerment Author, Expert Speaker and Coach. Your Journey Towards Greatness Starts Here: http://www.tonyfahkry.com/

Mission.org

A network of business & tech podcasts designed to accelerate learning. Selected as “Best of 2018” by Apple. Mission.org

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