How to Quiet Your (Inner) Critics, Manage Your Fears and Step into the Arena
Seems like an impossible task, doesn’t it?
When you’re overly worried about what other people might think or say about you, it can be crippling.
It can force you to question your instincts, and relinquish your power, and convince yourself that you’re better off doing nothing at all.
But it doesn’t have to be like that. You don’t have to live like that.
Even if you’ve given into those fears in the past, you don’t have to give into them anymore.
You can free yourself right here. Your time for daring greatly is right now.
All you have to do is step into the arena.
If you’re unable to watch the video, its transcript is below…
TRANSCRIPT:
The Man in the Arena
On April 23, 1910, Theodore Roosevelt delivered his famous “Man in the Arena” speech.
(The official title of the speech was actually “Citizenship in a Republic.”)
I don’t remember when I first learned about this address, but I do remember being immediately enthralled by it.
A maxim, a mission statement, a code — I don’t know what you’d call it, but these were my words to live by.
There have been times when I’ve printed out the speech’s well-known passage and carried it around in my back pocket, hoping its message would seep through my jeans and into my bloodstream.
Unfortunately, the osmosis never took.
While I’ve always talked a good game about wanting to be in the arena, I rarely have been. Which is why I figured this would be a good time to re-read Roosevelt’s words in hopes of dispelling the fears that have kept me out.
To make sure I don’t miss anything, I’ve broken down the speech’s legendary section into four parts.
(Roosevelt’s words are quoted at the top of each section.)
Part 1: Monday Morning Quarterbacks
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
As a lifelong sports fan, few things drive me crazier than Monday morning quarterbacks — those people who use hindsight to point out how others screwed up in real-time.
And over the last several years, as I’ve paid more attention to the news and politics, I’ve realized it’s the same thing there. It’s the same thing everywhere.
Everyone’s a know-it-all, even if they don’t know anything.
I remember the first time I had an article published on a large website. I was thrilled — until I read the comments section.
It was brutal. It’s why I rarely read the comments on my articles anymore.
And it’s why, among other reasons, I was hesitant to start making this video series.
What if people didn’t like me?
Or disagreed with me?
Or thought this was an idiotic idea?
Or mocked me for having an awful camera presence and a sleep-inducing, monotone voice?
But as Roosevelt points out, you shouldn’t give power to the critics, especially the negative ones.
In fact, earlier in his speech, he goes to town on them, explaining:
The poorest way to face life is to face it with a sneer…A cynical habit of thought and speech, a readiness to criticize work which the critic himself never tries to perform, an intellectual aloofness which will not accept contact with life’s realities — all these are marks, not … of superiority but of weakness.
Part 2: The Invaluable and Inevitable Nature of Failure
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;
Two things stand out about this part:
First…
The man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood.
That’s quite an image. It reminds me of another famous speech — when legendary football coach Vince Lombardi talks about what it takes to be №1.
He said:
I firmly believe that any man’s finest hour — his greatest fulfillment to all he holds dear — is that moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle — victorious.
To reference a previous video I did, that’s the embodiment of satisfaction.
Second, I love how, before mentioning things like triumph and victory, Roosevelt first talks about defeat, about erring and coming up short, again and again.
The point being that not only is failure inevitable, it’s also invaluable.
It’s invaluable for growth, and building grit, and for one day, finally getting things right.
So it’s something we shouldn’t shy away from, yet too often do. I know I’m guilty of that.
But now’s the time to work on that.
There are a million cliches about failure and how to deal with it, but allow me to add another:
The more you shelter yourself from failure, the more you guarantee it.
Part 3: The (Unfair) Knock on Participation Trophies
But who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;
If there’s one symbol that represents what many believe to be the softening of our society, it’s probably the participation trophy in youth sports.
If you didn’t do anything to earn it, how can you appreciate it?
While I believe in that sentiment, I also believe it’s missing the mark when it comes to youth sports.
After all, to receive a participation trophy, you have to participate. And that’s an accomplishment in and of itself.
Which is the point Roosevelt is making here.
If you commit to your teammates, compete in practice, show up to the games and complete the season, you should be applauded.
And, you should take pride in that, in starting a task and seeing it through to the finish.
We live in a front-running society, where winners are glorified and losers are called…losers. And I’m not sure that either/or dynamic is something we want to perpetuate.
I’m not saying we should give meaningless mounts of plastic for no apparent reason.
And I have no problem with rewarding performance-based achievements. Excellence is commendable, and we should all be encouraged to pursue it.
What I am saying, though, is we should pay attention to more than just the final score.
That’s the beauty of youth sports. Beyond the camaraderie and competition and Capri Suns, they present life lessons children can absorb and apply in every facet of life.
And what more important lesson could there be for anyone to learn than this:
Get in the game.
Part 4: When Ignorance is the Opposite of Bliss
Who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
That is so brilliant, so poetic, so perfect, I’m afraid to say anything about it. It deserves to stand on its own, to be presented without comment.
But I can’t help adding a personal note.
I believe that while life doesn’t always give us what we want, it does give us what we need.
In my case, I needed to read Roosevelt’s speech when I was younger, just like I needed to start my death clock when I got older.
For far too long, I’ve lived as a cold and timid soul, terrified of both victory and defeat.
But now, as the seconds keep ticking off my overall tally, Roosevelt’s words carry a little bit more weight.
And hopefully, they’ll give me a little bit more confidence to take another step out of the dark, and into the arena.
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