If I Die Today

If I die today, I will not be in a better place. I will be dead. I will not have the gift to suffer anymore. Suffering is a part of being human. I’ve been grateful for the suffering I’ve experienced. It’s taught me how to be at peace, to love myself and others.

This is the only life I’ve known. My purpose has been to know myself, to fully feel and allow others to feel. Don’t be afraid to feel it all, feeling is how we get to experience life.

Know that all I’ve wanted is for people to be kind, to nourish our communities and this world.

I was always doing my best. We all are.

If you feel that I’ve caused you suffering, I’m deeply sorry. I trust that we both were able to learn.

Everyone of you have been my teacher. Thank you.

For my funeral, let it be a celebration. You do not have to honor me by being there. If you want to honor me, do so by being with yourself, with your emotions.

I think of “my body” as mine as I am alive; when I die, it will no longer be. If circumstances are as such to have my dead body, please allow that body to be naked. I came into this world naked and so I shall leave.

Please do not put any preservatives in my body. Do not prep my body to be presented. Do not shave my body. Let that body be.

Please bury my body in a field or forest. Drop my body back into the earth. Let my body continue on the circle of life. Please no coffin or head stone.

If my body is too cumbersome to transport, please burn it in a fire.

My closest friend will have the courage to lead the ceremony. I do not want the ceremony to be religious.

I want there to be live music. Someone singing would be more than enough, drums would be enough, ideally many but even just one. Please no bag pipes, please no hymns.

I deeply love this world and the people I’ve shared it with. Its all about the people. We are all connected. We are also connected to nature, because we are nature. We get the gift to breathe with this world. Please nourish yourself, others and the world.

Honesty and compassion is what I’ve needed to sustain. Listening is compassion.

Then meditate and dance like you do, like I did, and celebrate that in this moment you can feel.


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The best gift I can imagine is that you write your very own “If I Die” and post the link in the comments here below. (this was originally posted on andrewparr.com/ifidie).

I wrote this for myself and my loved ones — to share with them my current truths. This is important to share with our communities while we have this life to do so. This is a living post and could also change, I will update if I feel the need.