“Look up at me. No, not your phone.”
How to save your neck, not get bored and make real connections.
As I walked into work, I couldn’t believe it.
A line of students. At least 15 of them, spread out on benches as I walked by each one. My jaw dropped a little, because I didn’t really want to believe it was true, yet here we were.
Everyone was on their phone.
Every. Single. Person.
I’m concerned.
Really, really concerned about this.
Partially because, for a long time, I would’ve fit right in. It actually took consistent work and the realization that I wanted to live in the real world (imagine that) to finally get my phone out of my face.
Nowadays, everyone is on their phone. Even my Mom gets sucked into it and she’s in her late 50’s. A few days ago a 7-year-old completely ignored me for 2 hours because his iPad was far more interesting.
He didn’t even know I was there.
Terrifying.
1. Our poor necks.
Ever heard of Text Neck?
I hadn’t either, but it’s real. And I’ve had it.
Just a few week’s ago I’d spent far, far too much time on my phone helping a friend in a tough situation. While it was for a heroic purpose, I never lifted my phone up to my face.
Waking up the next day was miserable. Sharp pains in my back, a numbness in my neck and, even worse, my bathtub was designed in maybe the least comfortable way imaginable.
Needless to say, I now hold my phone up high when I use it.
As my students say, “like an old person”.
2. There’s a world out there, Frodo
One of those people on those benches could be your best friend, soul mate or future business partner.
Okay, probably not, but they could be.
You can’t be exposed to new people and new opportunities scrolling through Twitter on your phone. Sure, you might meet some virtual friends, but those relationships will never be quite the same.
Last week I met someone at a bar with so many of the same interests I was completely taken aback. This meeting would’ve never happened if I sat in the back of the bar, sipped my tequila and scrolled through Instagram like an anti-social, pretentious, somewhat flamboyant idiot.
3. “Are those sirens?!”
This is less common. But worth thinking about.
Mass shootings are a horrible reality nowadays. Terror attacks happen all the time. People text and drive. Fights break out. Maybe a dog with rabies will pop up out of nowhere…I don’t know.
If nobody is paying attention and everyone is on their phone, how is anyone going to read the signs? Who will pick up on that sketchy guy (and yeah, it’s probably a man) who looks like he could be up to something?
We’re putting ourselves in really terrible situations. Combine looking down with noise-canceling earbuds and we’re basically just sitting ducks.
“But Chris, I get bored.”
Thankfully, we have solutions:
1. If you’re bored, listen to a podcast or audiobook or music.
What if I told you that you could still distract yourself from the real world, get smarter and be somewhat aware at the same time?
Listen to something interesting.
Podcasts are kinda having a moment. Everyone and their grandmother has a podcast. There are even podcasts on Ru Paul’s Drag Race. 4 on Taylor Swift.
If you can’t find anything then you’re probably too boring.
No offense.
2. Lower the volume.
Guys, look, we’re pretty stupid. And that’s OK because, thankfully, you’re reading this article before your eardrums blow out.
If your volume is near 75% capacity, you’re in trouble.
“Hearing loss is practically an epidemic among young people in middle- and high-income countries — and it’s getting worse, not better. The World Health Organization said last week that 1.1 billion people ages 12–35 listen to personal audio devices at “unsafe volumes,” risking permanent hearing loss.”
Many of us don’t have earbuds or headphones that fit our ears correctly. Start there and make sure you never go over two-thirds of the volume bar.
3. Try to talk to at least 1 new person a day
We all have different lifestyles, but you probably see people somewhere. Public transportation, offices in other parts of the building, eateries you’ve never checked out before.
Even if you fail, you’ve tried. I’ve gotten into weird, fascinating conversations with random strangers. Generally, people look really annoyed and sort of angry at a distance, but when you engage with them, they’re way nicer.
Yes, people are generally nice. For y’all in New York City, godspeed.
Maybe talk to a subway rat or something.
I don’t know.
4. Just keep your head up.
The quick fix: rotate your head up to 90 degree or so.
Straighten your back.
Voila!
There’s so much world out there and so few people living in it. Be different. Be daring. Be cool by being rather un-cool.
I, for one, would like to meet you.
Thanks for reading! I’m grateful you’re here.
If you’d like to see more, follow me here on Medium.
