What I learned by baring it all on Medium

5 transformative experiences you will gain by exposing yourself

Brandon Evans
Aug 24, 2017 · 5 min read

There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. — Aristotle

On my 40th birthday, I chose to “celebrate” by confronting my biggest fear, being vulnerable. I had never published on Medium before, never written about my personal life anywhere. But, I knew deep down it was time. Nothing could have prepared me for the response I would receive.

The story poured out of me. I wrote so much that editing became quite a difficult task. When finally complete, I had whittled 12,000 words down to a still massive 6,000 word (24 min) memoir of my life. I titled it Lost on Purpose. The article was 5x longer than most here and it was my first article, so I assumed few would read it.

I was wrong. A few days after posting, it became the Top Recommended Story on Medium for the day. It was picked up by The Mission, Medium’s leading publication in personal growth. In three weeks, nearly 20,000 people viewed the article, 5,000 read it and 1,000 people recommended it. In this age of short attention spans, I was humbled that all these people took a half hour out of their day to read my story.

I wrote about my spiritual transformation from a successful Type A founder to joyfully Lost on Purpose. I had no idea that writing the article itself would become such a huge step in my growth process.

The experience of writing and publishing that article was so powerful. As a result, I feel compelled to share my lessons learned. Here are five transformative experiences I gained by sharing my story vulnerably:

1. Authenticity

My whole life I felt that people didn’t really understand me. As someone who has lived life fairly closed, I didn’t give them much of a chance. For the past few years, I have been on a spiritual journey and much within me has shifted. These have all been positive changes. But, I felt more and more of a wall between me and those who knew me before.

I felt a major contradiction between the man I now am and the man most still perceived me to be. I didn’t want to be people’s perception of me, I wanted to be me. Baring my soul to the world in writing has allowed me to do that. My most innermost thoughts are now all over the Internet for everyone to see. There is no hiding.

2. Acceptance

We often go through life never processing all that we are taught. There are lessons everywhere. Until we accept and own these lessons, we cannot move forward. By sharing my story, I was able to accept my truth. I had already declared it to the world.

Through writing and editing my story I also became re-connected to it. I was able to relive it over and over again. There were so many details and lessons that had faded. Now, I was face to face with them again. There is no more fighting it.

3. Accountability

Writing about my life lessons has had the positive effect of keeping me accountable. By putting words to paper (or internet), I reinforced them. I enabled myself to acknowledge all the amazing changes I had made in my life. It became even more clear that I had no interest in going back.

By sharing my lessons with others, I’ve also become acutely aware when I fail to follow my own advice. A core focus for me has been to shift from Type A to “Type Be”. When I catch myself obsessing over future goals and not enjoying the present, I am immediately reminded of my own advice. I am able to course correct quickly as I know I should practice what I preach.

4. Connection

The internet can often cause us to skim the surface of relationships. We don’t need to call friends, we just use FB messenger or share an Instagram story. “Conversations” often offer little depth or true connection.

Being vulnerable and sharing intimate details of my life opened up new possibilities. The people I already knew, including my family, got to understand me at a much deeper level. I was also able to allow people I didn’t know to connect deeply with me and my story. The result has been powerful in ways I could never imagine. Here is one of many heartfelt responses I received from Lost on Purpose:

5. Gratitude

Reliving so many important moments in my life reminded me of how much I have to be grateful for. It’s often hard to appreciate in the moment. Even when life seems to be creeping along, there is so much beauty around, so many moments we overlook.

Many experiences appear negative as we go through them. But every experience is a gift given to us to help us grow. By opening up my life and sharing it with others, I saw everything as positive. The pain that I had experienced taught me the most and brought me to the exact place I stand now. I wouldn’t take any of it back.

Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here. The spiritual journey is the relinquishment, or unlearning, of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts. — Marianne Williamson

Despite the frequent urge, it took me years to begin to write and publish my story. If I knew all that I would gain, I would have done so sooner. If I knew the impact I would have on all the readers that have commented and reached out, I wouldn’t have waited a moment.

Most of us keep our stories so tight as if they are our own. They are not. Your story is someone else’s; most likely thousands, if not millions.

Bare your soul.

Let your true colors shine through.

And, let the love surprise you too.

If you enjoyed reading this, please hold down that 👏🏼 below so more can read it. You can also follow me to be the first to see my stories.

The Mission publishes stories, videos, and podcasts that make smart people smarter. You can subscribe to get them here.

Mission.org

A network of business & tech podcasts designed to accelerate learning. Selected as “Best of 2018” by Apple. Mission.org

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Brandon Evans

Written by

Recovering Type A | Aspiring Type Be | Chief Elevation Officer + Co-Founder @ 1heart.com | Coach & Guide to Heart-Led Entrepreneurs | Getting Lost on Purpose :)

Mission.org

A network of business & tech podcasts designed to accelerate learning. Selected as “Best of 2018” by Apple. Mission.org

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