Siri, Tongue Punch My Fart Box
The limitations of digital assistants
There’s not been another invention in my lifetime that’s been a bigger game changer than the smart phone. In 2009 I replaced my LG Envy 3 side folding smart phone with keyboard for the Motorola Droid. The first Android smart phone available in the United States.
It was a frigging television in your pocket! With a computer attached! And GPS! Alarm clock! Holy shit, I can use it as a remote control too! Nothing had a touchscreen back then besides ATMs.
The first person I knew with a smart phone was me. I got it the day it became available.
The killer app for me was the voice command.
The first thing I did when I got my first smart phone was agree to the 80-page terms of service without reading it.
Whatever, it’s not like they’re going to listen to every word I say.
The second thing I did was hold down the microphone button and said, “Show me boobs.”
And boobs it did show. Hundreds and hundreds of boobs. I kept scrolling, it kept showing me more boobs…
