To lean in: Pursue your goals with tenacity
Not knowing an outcome could be one of the most infuriating parts of being a human. Waiting for a company to call after submitting your resume, the days of uncertainty for breast cancer test results, wondering if your kids will grow up to be decent human beings…
I first heard the idea of “leaning in” when I read the synopsis of Sheryl Sandburg’s book “Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead.” The Chief Operating Officer of Facebook, Sandburg’s call to action for women is to not be afraid to take risks and pursue their own goals with tenacity.
While the career and gender equality aspect of “leaning in” is traveling wildly around the world there are other movements that address pressing into stress rather than just fighting it. An acquaintance commented recently about how she wanted to “do what I do” in terms of becoming a writer. As she spoke of her aspirations to quit her full-time job and “just” be a writer, my writer’s life flashed before my eyes. But not the successes, mind you, what my brain pulled out front and center, was the struggles of how I got to where I was in that moment: a newly published author and freelance writer. I chuckled to myself remembering all the early mornings and weekends and holidays spent working, sometimes for free and many times, compensated a pitiful amount. Being in the fetal position, wracking my brain to get inspired and working multiple jobs, all the while desperate to prove everyone wrong that I could be a writer and be successful.
The woman I was talking to asked, “how can I do what you do?” and without skipping a beat, here is what I told her:
Don’t expect the end result to happen overnight. Every single moment in between each goal is preparing you for the next step.
Don’t just try and get through the stress. Lean into the tough moments. Take notes (yes, I’m talking about a journal) so you can reflect back on how far you’ve come and see your progress.
Set tiny goals. This has always been hard for me because I’m a world take-over kind of girl. I want the big picture — right now. Backing up and setting goals, small ones, to get to that desired goal will help morale on the way to the top of your mountain. My writing career started out as 15 minutes of writing a day.
Be content in the present, but not satisfied until your dream has come true.
Tune out the naysayers. I would run out of paper making a list of the times people have doubted the vision for my life. Eye rolls, laughter, and comments of “you’re crazy!” top the the list of responses. I believed in my ideas and stories — and that’s all that mattered.
Prioritize your time. Learning to say “no” to time sucking tasks (and soul sucking people) is quite liberating once you experience the productive outcome of moving that much closer to your dream.
Don’t just do it for the money.
Celebrate each success.
Ditch the guilt.
Seek out a higher power. Mine happens to be Jesus, but the idea of an entity bigger than ourselves crosses the minds of so many of my friends, and not necessarily just Christians. Here’s why I encourage the exploration of a higher power: because there are going to be moments of burnout and doubt. Exhaustion where your eyes are oozing out of your brain and rejections are coming in faster than you can be productively creative. And let me remind you, religion is not the same as spirituality. If you’ve had a bad experience with a particular doctrine or felt the pain of judgement in a community of “religious” people, it’s easy to see how you would run from the suggestion of connecting with a higher power. Instead, decide what a spiritual journey looks like to you and investigate how to grow in that relationship. I wanted peace, unconditional love, and an abundance of creativity and humor in my higher power, so I studied and found my way to Christ. This relationship has been a game changer in my career and my life as a whole. My spiritual journey might not look like other people’s idea of religion, but it works for me and Jesus serves as a wonderful sounding board for my ideas.
Most importantly — don’t give up. Find yourself a trusted advisor or mentor who’s walked down a path similar to where you’d like to be and absorb their wisdom.
What are your dreams? Do you find yourself hesitant to lean in for fear of the unknown?
This article was originally published in the Kane County Chronicle on July 19, 2018
