Letters to Pete: “Mothers in New Hampshire are looking for a hero.”
By Linda Q., NH
Every day, Pete Buttigieg receives letters from Americans who believe we need a new approach to solve our nation’s biggest challenges. This is one of them. The following letter is transcribed as it was received on September 9th, 2019.
I am just one member of a club, a club made up of all socio economic backgrounds, of all races, of all political ideologies. It’s a club no one signs up for…we are mothers of children with disabilities. Some of us are able to sell our homes and move our families in order to find schools that will not segregate our children — we are lucky. Some of us are able to find the time to get involved in local politics and run for office to help change our local governments’ attitudes on disability and oppression. But unless we are incredibly wealthy, none of us are able to live with the same liberties that other parents enjoy.
I’m not free to retire to a warmer climate. My daughter and her siblings are not free. There are almost ½ million people with developmental disabilities waiting for services under the Medicaid waivers in over 40 states in our country. Some states have waiting lists that will likely not be cleared in my lifetime, or my daughter’s life time. Parents of children with disabilities will never retire. We will be care givers until the day we die unless something changes.
I’m rarely inspired by politicians. I rarely get involved in Democratic Politics. I canvassed for Obama once or twice, I birddogged the other guys in NH town halls here and there. I have helped Senator Hassan when I could because she and I are in the same club. Although we may not have chosen to be part of this club, it is a club that brings out the greatness in women. It was the reason Maggie got involved in politics. It is the reason I am serve on my local school board and volunteer organizing and training other mothers to enter the public arena. It is the reason so many mothers serve as public officials in New Hampshire. It is the reason NH has the first sub-minimum wage law on the books and the strongest restraint and seclusions rules in the country. The mothers of children with disabilities in NH are a force to be reckoned with and we are looking for inspiration.
John Lewis wrote in Walking in the Wind, “One group of people who helped us find our own courage in these communities were the local women, the matriarchal heads of so many of these households. Over and over again we found that it was the women — wives and mothers in their forties and fifties, hardworking, humorous, no-nonsense, incredibly resilient woman who had carried such an unimaginable weight through their own lives and had been through so much unspeakable hell that there was nothing left on this earth for them to be afraid of — who showed us the way to mobilize in the towns and communities where they lived. No one was more ready, eager and willing to climb on the Freedom Train in these little towns and on these little farms than the women.” I do not wish to compare the plight of privileged mothers in NH now with those in Selma during the civil rights movement. Our oppression in no way compares to what women like Fannie Lou went through, but nonetheless Congressman Lewis’ words inspired me 12 years ago when I first read them and they continue to inspire me today.
Mothers in New Hampshire are looking for a hero. We are excited about Senator Hassan serving us in the US Senate especially after Senator Harkin’s retirement, but my daughter (Mary) doesn’t have a John Lewis or an MLK. There is an opening in New Hampshire, the disability community is organized, we have a fire in our belly and we want our voices to be heard. Mothers of children with disabilities have a very clear self-interest — it’s simple — we want to die knowing our children will not be left to rot in an institution, abused or neglected. Until then, we fight — tirelessly. Will you fight with us? Actions/Words matter to voters like me and thousands like me. You have started a buzz in the “club in NH” your fellow candidates are just blowing it. Please put out a policy that is based in dignity and helps our dream of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for my daughter and her her brother and sister. For us, it’s still just a dream.
Pete believes that unpaid caregivers for people with disabilities deserve support and that the American dream should accessible to everyone. Want to learn more? Read his plan.

