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Arya Stark’s Kill List and My Guard Dog Ego

How Needle and Spike Were Retired

Leah Welborn
The Narrative Arc
4 min readNov 20, 2023

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Original artwork by the author

Game of Thrones was a cultural phenomenon for good reason. Beyond the dragons, epic battle scenes, and graphic sex, the core of the story was chock full o’ Jungian archetypes and universal themes of good and evil (embodied, at least for a while, in a bratty teenage king, no less).

Though I was a devotee at first, I simply could not deal with the huge number of rapes sprinkled liberally throughout the show like titillating eye candy for the sadistic male gaze, so dropped out early on.

Still, though, parts of the story stay with me as metaphors for contemporary life that happen to be set in a pseudo-medieval fantasy world. A fitting mishmash for our times.

Game of Pain

I’ve written about my own metaphorical journey often. Briefly stated, I was profoundly ill for over 40 years and now I’m not.

In a little more detail… I grew up depressed, anxious, and suicidal. I’m autistic, but I wasn’t diagnosed until just a couple of years ago which meant a lifetime of confusion. I was bullied, most of all by my father, and my guard dog ego ran my life for decades in a ludicrous attempt to keep me emotionally safe. For reasons I can’t quite explain, the pandemic brought with it mercy and grace…

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The Narrative Arc
The Narrative Arc

Published in The Narrative Arc

Medium’s best creative nonfiction — memoirs and personal essays. Welcoming writers from every walk of life.

Leah Welborn
Leah Welborn

Written by Leah Welborn

Empower Your Magical Self with me. I'm the Mystic Autistic, a writer and spiritual baddie. LeahWelborn.net.

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