Member-only story
THE NARRATIVE ARC
I Had an Eating Disorder
My extremely picky eating affected every aspect of my life
As I sat down for my first meal at university, I was anxious; not about whether I’d fit in, be homesick or make friends, but about food.
Anxiously picking up a tray, I went to see the options. As a vegetarian with a limited diet, none of the choices seemed safe. I sat down with my new friends, chatting to draw attention away from my plate of food. It didn’t work, and the comments started when I tucked into a plate of chips and rice.
The university only offered half-board accommodation on campus. Throughout my year in the university halls of residence, I rotated who I sat with for dinner so my limited diet would be less obvious. The comments often hurt. My extremely picky eating habits were often viewed as childish. Sometimes, I’d eat alone to avoid having to explain my food choices. Often, I made excuses that I had something in my room to have later or that I had eaten too much earlier in the day. Neither was true.
My attempts to hide my issues with food became much more difficult. I was skinny: somewhere between slightly underweight and borderline normal. Friends started to ask me outright if I had an eating disorder, especially when I started to eat alone or not turn up…