BOOSTED BY MEDIUM

Real Fun Stories From the Emergency Department by an ER Doctor

A whimsical happy story involving a cantankerous co-worker

I know what we’ll do. We’ll brew up some of these and see if we can get high. Won’t that be fun! Photo by Antonino Visalli on Unsplash

Just in case you’re wondering, I’m a retired ER Doc with decades in the trenches and a head full of joyous stories straight from the gates of Emergency Department Hell.

Here’s one of those stories.

One day, Bob the Surgeon decided to play “bash in my head” with his hair-trigger temper and his Defcon 1 personality disorder.

We’ll call him “Bob” because that’s not his name.

We’ll also call him a trauma surgeon, since (unfortunately) that’s what he was.

We can layer in 24/7/365 asshole and malignant narcissist since he was also that.

Bob was hanging out in the Emergency Department’s (ED) trauma area, delighting the female nursing staff with hugs and shoulder rubs.

He was also spreading his special brand of good cheer by rubbing his gut on as many young female employees as possible.

Just then my next patient walked in, slurring the joyous message “I got shot in the head.”

As I leaned in to begin my examination I felt Bob’s hot breath on my neck, his gut nearly…