Five ways to keep breathing when the world is burning down, and one way to freak out
Sometimes we have weeks where the threat of nuclear war is the second scariest thing that happens. I think we’re all still recovering from not only the actions of the last week, but the action (or inaction) of our leaders in the face of terror. So after you’ve done your breathing into a paper bag or ranting into the void, here are some things that may make you feel better:
1. COOK SOMETHING
Normally, I’m not super into cooking. I live in New York, I eat out more than any human possibly should because cooking is hard and it takes planning and it takes time. Take the time. Nourishing your body is a necessity and the hour that you spend in the kitchen is one less hour on Facebook. Let yourself get lost in meticulously chopping and stirring and making something creative that you can eat! Here are some recipes you could try:
Or make up your own! My favorite thing to do is a “kitchen sink” recipe, in which I open the fridge and just start throwing everything I have left on top of some pasta. (Everything but the kitchen sink.) Get creative and get out of your own head.
2. VISIT FRIENDS OR FAMILY*
There’s gonna start to be a theme here, which is get off the fucking internet. However, when you’re feeling outside of yourself and pulled in all directions, there’s nothing better than spending time with the people who know you the best. It’s easy to feel like you have to be “on” all of the time when there are major world events — whether that’s terrorism in Charlottesville or nuclear tirades from an authoritarian leader (yeah, you get to guess who I mean by that, because that’s the world we live in). Go see people who you can just be yourself with, where you don’t have to have an opinion about current events, maybe share a meal you cooked (see #1).
*Only the family you like who don’t hold awful fucking beliefs. This is about self-care not masochism.
3. EXERCISE
Second theme = things people tell you will make you feel better but sound fake. This one doubles as an opportunity to…. wait for it… get off the fucking internet. I used to take a pilates class twice a week and I loved it because no matter how stressed I was with grad school, or work, or family, it was two hours a week where I couldn’t think of any of that. All I could think about was holding the plank or jumping on the reformer. It was two hours a week where someone was literally reminding me at regular intervals to do the thing I’d been forgetting the rest of the time — to breathe.
If you prefer workout classes and are looking for something in your area, try Classpass. It’s available in most major cities and allows you to try classes without having to commit to a package at any one particular studio. I’m loving it so far!
Plus, exercise releases endorphins and endorphins make you happy and happy people just don’t kill their co-workers, they just don’t.
4. MEDITATE
Meditation also falls into the category of things people tell you will make you feel better but sound fake. It’s not. It really helps you get out of yourself for a little while, if you can manage it. I am very very bad at creating a regular meditation practice of like a couple of minutes a day. However, the mindfulness class I took in grad school gave me a lot of amazing tools and introduced me to a lot of techniques that I still use.
This grounding exercise is my favorite mediation. It has helped me countless times when my anxiety is through the roof and the world feels like it’s spinning a little. It helps you focus on following the frenetic energy through your body and driving it out. Try it, I swear it will help.
5. READ. WATCH. LISTEN. ESCAPE
I once read on some self-help blog that escapism isn’t rest, and it really annoyed me and stuck with me. If escapism is the way you rest, escape! Read your favorite book, watch your favorite TV show, listen to your favorite song over and over again until the words start to blur. Find a story to get lost in, something that will make you happy and take you away from here, then fall into it and get lost. Some people like to watch funny things, some people like to watch the musical episode of Grey’s Anatomy and sob into their pillow (cathartic crying is sort of like laughter right?). Here are some favorites for when you need to escape:
Books
Harry Potter (duh)
Stupid and Contagious by Caprice Crane
Enchanted Inc. by Shanna Swendson
The Truth About Forever
TV Shows (they’re all on Netflix)
Grey’s Anatomy season 6
Riverdale
Luke Cage
Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries
Music
This one’s harder and I feel less like giving suggestions because music seems more personal, but here’s what I’ve been listening to lately: Michael Jackson, Kendrick Lamar, the new Kesha album, the Hamilton Mixtape, the “Walk in Like You Own the Place” spotify mix. Piece by Piece by Kelly Clarkson. Just that song, like on repeat.
+1. SCREAM
Open the window, open your door, and scream at the top of your lungs, because the last few days (…weeks, months?) have been fucked up and it’s okay not to be okay. Scream until you’re hoarse, and your eyes are red, your muscles weak with it. Scream until you’ve expelled all of the bad energy that feels like it’s constantly building up.
Then remember nothing has changed. At the end of the day, for better or for worse, we’re still living in the same country we were living in on August 11th, there are the same number of Klansmen and Nazis, there are the same number of people being stifled and attacked and killed by racist rhetoric, there are the same despicable, racist leaders. You know those ICBMs we’ve all been kind of freaking about because no one can convince the President to deescalate the situation? North Korea had them before the story broke and has had them every day since and yet the world keeps spinning. So you keep spinning too.
Loving yourself, being firm in your convictions and confident in your activism, not letting anything shake you or change your stride is the biggest “fuck you” I can think of and god — FUCK FUCKING RACISTS AND TERRORISTS AND WARMONGERS AND WHITE TEARS AND THIS FUCKING FUCKED UP FUCKING WORLD FUCK IT ALLLLLLL.
