Sincerely, Stacks
Vol. 2
Dear Stacks,
I’m starting to get worried about Jose Mourinho. He’s becoming more and more unhinged as the days go on. This summer is going to be a big summer in terms of squad changes and it’s becoming increasingly likely that someone who shouldn’t be on the selling block, will be. What do we do?
Sincerely,
Mad in Manchester
Dear Mad in Manchester,
Honestly? You’re fucked. I know that’s not what you wanna hear right now, but it’s the truth. I, like many others, thought (wrongly) that Jose would finally change up now that he got one of his dream jobs (the other being Barcelona). It was assumed (wrongly) that he had learned his lessons from his last two jobs (Real Madrid and Chelsea) and would take a different approach when it came to dealing with his players. Now here we are, Year Three Mou in Year Two. Yeah, his press conferences make for interesting quotes and they’re provocative, it gets the people going. However, it does nothing to hide the fact that some of his best players are currently not performing at the level you expect them to and his tactics are easy to expose.
At the same time, who the hell can you realistically hire to replace him that’ll be an improvement? The ones that are, they’re currently employed. Of the coaches that aren’t employed half are unproven and the other half aren’t big enough for the job. Too many managers aren’t coaches, too many coaches aren’t managers, any too many are neither. So you’re stuck with him for at least another year. Your best bet is to sell off enough deadwood and buy smart this summer. Get him the players he wants and if he’s still underperforming, then you axe him.
As of right now, the FA Cup is still alive. I think y’all have the best chance of the underperforming four. You’re playing Spurs. Shithouse Jose® will hopefully snuff out Pochettino’s attack, then in the final it’s either Chelsea or Southampton. That’s easy money. Second place and the Champions League group stage should be locked up barring any mishaps so there’s not much else to worry about. Seeing as how the transfer season will be shortened for Premier League teams this summer, and given how much the market has inflated, it’ll be tough for United to lose out on players because the competition will be priced out and you guys must make moves in order to truly compete next year. You just have to hope that Mourinho doesn’t end up calling Luke Shaw a fat bitch on live television.
Sincerely,
Stacks Breadup
