Sincerely, Stacks
Vol. 3
Dear Stacks,
Seeing as how it is the international break, I was wondering what are your thoughts for what’s going to happen this summer in Russia. This might be the most loaded World Cup ever and there’s so many storylines that could unfold. I’m excited thinking about it, hope you are too.
Sincerely,
Curious in Curaçao
Dear Curious in Curaçao,
Ima keep it real with you chief, I don’t give a damn what happens in Russia. Come clean, ever since the USA SOILED IT (SOILED IT) against not just Trinidad, but Tobago as well, I been dejected as all fucks cus I don’t have a real vested interest in the tournament. I care deeply about the men and women who wear them Stars and Stripes for us. If I can’t start an “I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN” chant at random times throughout game day, keep it. BIG KEEP.
Ima keep it realer with you though chief, Ima still watch tho, Ima still watch tho. Ball is Life®. Come cleaner, I’m definitely rooting for chaos. I mean, I could root for the Barça Boyz™, but it doesn’t have that same emotion like when they wear the Blaugrana. I want them to perform well, but that’s it. I’m definitely rooting against Mexico and Nigeria tho. No racial, but talk to the resident Mexican and Nigerian in NU if you’re wondering why.
Anywho, the storylines? The best part of the World Cup. I can’t remember the last non-incidental WC. Wayne Rooney red card, Zidane Headbutt, Suárez handball, Evra coup d’état, Suárez biting, Neymar almost paralyzation and Brazil subsequent capitulation. Imagine the possibilities, especially in the powder keg of hooliganism and racism that is the Russian Federation. Honestly, the GIFs and Twitter will be jumping. I am so ready to unleash the hate.
Last, but not least. I just wanna say to all my fellow Americans, cop that kit still. It’s a fucking classic and you still gotta support the team *David Puddy voice*. Also, be as petty as possible to all teams eliminated, have enough room on the couch and supply your best Super Bowl snacks. We may not be partying in Russia but that doesn’t mean we still can’t be obnoxious like we usually are. It wouldn’t be an international sporting event without #US.
Sincerely,
Stacks Breadup
