‘If Women Want Equality at Work, They Should Act More Like Men’
And yet even when we do, we’re penalised for it
If there’s one thing there’s been no shortage of in recent years, it’s the amount of career advice for women.
We’re told to ‘lean in’ and ‘act more like a man’ and ‘just be more confident’ and ‘work extra hard to get noticed’ and ‘don’t be afraid to ask for more’ and… ‘stop emailing like a woman,’ because that’s also apparently a thing.
The most unhinged advice I have personally received is ‘just don’t think of yourself as a woman.’ Unfortunately, it’s kind of unavoidable not to think of yourself as who you are, as every look in the mirror or reflection in a window reminds you of that very fact. And so do people around you.
In my first — and only — office job I had the displeasure of being vastly outnumbered by men. And, unfortunately, I was acutely aware of being a woman for the simple reason that most ‘womanly’ duties were constantly dumped on my plate — all the organising and planning and birthday-cake-buying and taking care of the new joiners. Still, my last performance review made it clear I’m not trying ‘hard enough.’
No matter how well intended all these words of advice given over and over to women in a bid to close the gender pay and career gaps are…