If you don’t eat here, it’s a big missed steak

Despite being a hungry wolf it’s quite medium-rare that I would be seeking out a hulking big steak to sink my fangs into. Burgers, fine. Large slabs of chicken, bring it. But big bloody dripping chunks of steak, not so much.

After camping in the wilderness, near an overpriced general store, my friends were feeling malnourished and were in desperate need of steak. There was a lot of discussion about steak, and the oldest meatiest steakhouse in Northcote was mentioned as a place to retrieve the steak once returned to civilisation.

As part of my self-imposed blog challenge, I simply had to go with my steak seeking friends. They were as keen as English mustard, but I approached with trepidation. Can I eat a whole slab of meat? What’s so good about eating half a side of a cow? Should I become a vegetarian? Cows have such lovely eyelashes, etc. I agreed and we booked a table at Bekers Charcoal Grill Restaurant — the one with the brick exterior and yellow door (not Ray White real estate). The steak INSTITUTION of Northcote.

Walking into Bekers, was like walking into a man-cave, that is shared with a grizzly bear and a big steak grill….and also probably Bear Grylls. The wooden ceiling made us feel like we’re sat in an upturn boat, full of sports memorabilia (man-orabilia) lining the walls. We discuss whether it was a photo of Lawrence Mooney on the wall, or Mark ‘Chopper’ Reid. It was neither.

We were greeted by Gary, an ex-boxer and steak expert. He is friendly and explained the different cuts of steak, the cooking process, the lack of sauce required, the lack of chips on the menu (chips are filler to make up for a lame piece of meat), an affirmed that we made the correct decision to come to him for our meat feeding frenzy.

I opted for an eye-fillet, a cut that is popular with the ladies. Lady’s choice please! One of my dining companions also went the way of the eye-fillet, while the others chose a scotch-fillet. Other options were rib-eye, rump (baby got back), porterhouse, roundhouse (which one is incorrect?). There’s also sausages, shaslicks and chevaps…but there is no time for meat sticks…we were all about steak.

All pieces of meat were cooked by Gary on the grill, in plain view from our table. It looked geeewwwd. It smelt right. He brought our meat over to the salivating table. It was served up with a house salad and crusty bread rolls. What more do you need? (Wine also was consumed)

I’d never had a steak like this before. The steak knife was obsolete, you could use a BUTTER KNIFE TO CUT IT. The meat just melted away in my mouth. Incredible. This is what steak is about. This is why people bang on about how good steak is. NOW I KNOW AND UNDERSTAND.

I think I’m a convert. I’ve converted to liking steak. Bekers knows what’s going on. Don’t make the MISTEAK of going to all those fancy new steak joints that aren’t in Northcote. Just go meat your friends at Bekers. Gary will sort you out. And some of his sport memorabilia is for sale. And also, sticky date pudding has been added to the menu.

Meat done to perfection.


Originally published in Hungry Wolf of High Street at medium.com on January 29, 2015.