Mike Pence In Session (14)

The Lay Psychiatrist has to deal with a whiter man than thou

Daniel Lee
The Open Kimono
3 min readFeb 9, 2022

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Let’s get straight to it. There are suits wearing earpieces all over the street. I think they are Mormons. They protect the Vice President, who is at this moment in my office, seated primly in a red leather chair. He’s not a guy who sprawls out with his legs apart. He’s wearing a nice suit and he looks crisp as new money. The white hair must have some kind of symbolic meaning, an aura of consciousness, like a halo, crowning a god devoted man.

“You said on the phone that your faith is being tested,” I reminded him, trying to give him a kick start, because he looked vaguely stunned, like the words had hit his head like a sack of rocks.

“I got mixed up with the mob,” he said. “and I saw that I was in service to the anti-Christ. There is no shock of consciousness for a man who loves Christ more disturbing than to come face to face with the shadow of Christ, and find you are serving him as your master.” He leaned forward and expressed outward with his body at such a subtle level it was visible just in his hands, which conducted allegro in response to a symphony in the background of awareness. “When I spoke to expose the truth, instead of disguise it as a villain, something changed in me.”

“You now want to provide accurate information.”

“An odd way to put it. But why not? I put my foot in the water and now I want to swim. I’ll set up a commission to find the people who have accurate information. They must exist, even if I’ve not been introduced.”

He smiled like he was receiving Grace. If you don’t keep up with AI news, Grace is the first the first robot who is a literally a dick. She is a sentient dildo with a refined sense of smell with which she details in distributed memory the inner passages she traverses. This allows her to access deep memory and emotion which combine with the most subtle and suggestive movements to evoke exquisite responses.

It was that kind of smile.

“I’ll find the smartest people in their field and get the best information I can get, and share it with everybody.”

“Well, Mike, that’s what we were doing before your mob bosses started attacking the experts and replacing them with snake oil salesmen. Poor old Dr. Fauci, trying to manage pandemics, and these low lifes are setting the Trump monkeys on his family. What the fuck is wrong with you, Mike? You’re supposed to be a poster boy for decency.”

“I’m not the man I used to be. I’m reborn. Again. It’s cyclic. I feel like Scrooge on Christmas morning. There’s so much good to do in the world I don’t know where to start.” He was glowing like his balls were experiencing the second descension. “I intend to tell the plain truth, just the way it is.”

“You don’t actually carry money, do you?”

“Somebody will come along behind me and pay the bills.”

Shadowgnosis

Adelia Ritchie

(Search The Lay Psychiatrist or Shadowgnosis to find more episodes)

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Daniel Lee
The Open Kimono

I have worked as an editor and magazine journalist. My main interests were psychology and humor.