Behati Got Cheated on and Everyone is So Shocked — Why?
The real reason why women are stunned at this latest cheating scandal
On September 19th, Sumner Stroh uploaded a video to TikTok revealing to the world that she had had an affair with Adam Levine, the famous Maroon 5 front man.
My TikTok for you page has been flooded with video after video of women commenting on this latest cheating scandal.
Some were bashing Sumner Stroh for her involvement in the affair as the mistress and her lack of apology. Others include women expressing their incredulity on how his wife, Behati Prinsloo, a Victoria's Secret Model got cheated on.
I couldn’t help but notice the sheer amount of comments remarking about how
“If a Victoria Secret Model can be cheated on, then no one is safe.”
Now it's possible that this is some women’s way of coping with the fact that Adam Levine would cheat on his gorgeous Victoria's Secret Model wife or further lament the subculture of cheating that men, across all economic backgrounds, seem to engage in, but the fact that this prompted many women to come out of the woodworks to say the silent part out loud, is very telling.
It alludes to a much deeper issue.
These comments remarking that if Behati was cheated on, then “us regular women have no chance” is not only harmful, but it evidently comes from a deeply seeded place of internalized misogyny.
I believe that many women had so much to say about this particular cheating scandal because it triggered their subconscious fears about being everything and more to a man, but still not being “enough” to keep him from cheating.
This is a prime example of one of the toxic ideas that the patriarchy has induced in us that says, women must have the perfect bodies, be extremely attractive, be the perfect wife, be youthful, and adopt the perfect agreeable countenance in order to be loved and appreciated by men in society.
It effectively takes the onus off of men to hold themselves to a higher standard because if a woman “simply” does everything right, she will be treated the right way by the men in her life.
Fortunately, that myth has been debunked countless times through celebrity stars such as Beyonce, Jennifer Aniston, Candice Swanepoel, etc., who are all extremely attractive women who got cheated on. Even looking back to more tangible real-life examples such as our parents and grandparents, we know for a fact that your exceptional performance as a woman does not even guarantee mediocre treatment from a man.
Cheating should not be the humiliation worn on women like a scarlet letter, ensuing questions that revolve around her. Cheating should be the stain of the person who cheated and betrayed their commitment to their partner. Cheating reflects poorly on the cheater, not their partner.
Another important point to follow up with is the idea that a woman being very attractive, exempts her from being cheated on.
It inadvertently says that if you are ugly, it is okay if you are cheated on. Whether you look like Adriana Lima or a conventionally unattractive person, you should have no say on whether or not you deserve to be cheated on.
If a person made a commitment to someone in which they vowed to be faithful to them, then they should honor the commitment. It’s as simple as that.
When the beauty of a person being cheated on is the main component to try and understand why they got cheated on, you miss the point altogether.
Cheating can only call into question the character of the person who cheated, not the attractiveness of their partner.
If you don’t believe this, that means subconsciously, you believe the myth that society has pushed onto women, that their value comes from their beauty and how much leverage(relationships, money, respect) they can garner from it.
For decades, women have been working to dismantle this belief placed on us, so when you make comments like these that further enforce these misogynistic ideologies, you work against your own progression.
So please when you see another celebrity cheating scandal, because this is certainly not the first and is not even close to being the last, do not go into a panic, second-guessing yourself as a woman because such a beautiful and renowned woman got cheated on.
Realize that if a man wants to cheat, they will cheat. No amount of beauty can subdue a man’s internal nature to be unfaithful and no amount of being “good enough” will quench his insatiable appetite for multiple women.
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