A MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION

Embracing a “So What” Attitude for the Good of Our Kids

The downstream benefits are many

Unsplash+
In collaboration with Andrej Lišakov

My mom told me many times a story that concluded, “It was the best twenty-five dollars I ever spent.”

What was the story?

My brother was in 6th grade at the time and had frequent stomachaches. When my mom took him to the pediatrician, the doctor suggested my parents make an appointment with a psychologist. My parents didn’t really understand why, but they trusted their pediatrician, so my parents and my brother spoke with said psychologist.

What did my mom learn?

My brother was an excellent student. He shared top billing with another student whose name was Barry. When my brother would come home from school and report his test scores, my mom would typically ask two questions:

• “What did you miss?” Since my brother usually scored in the high nineties on his tests, it might have been only one question that he missed. The answer was easy on one level. Emotionally, though, there was some collateral damage.
• “What did Barry get?” Obviously, my mom was expressing a competitive instinct that wasn’t her finest hour. It’s good to know that even our heroes have their unfine hours.