AGING

Kids These Days Are Missing Out

Lack of mischief and convenience stunts brain growth in kids

Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

Kids these days are missing out. I feel sorry for them.

Kids these days will never know the rush of calling someone out of the blue by finding their phone number in the White Pages. I did this in high school, ringing a gal named Michelle, whom I barely knew. Thankfully, her last name wasn’t Smith or Johnson, so I didn’t have to make dozens of calls to find her. I didn’t hang up either. I got right to the point.

“Uhhhhhhh, Michelle. Are you going to Homecoming?” I asked, my hand trembling.

“Are you asking me to go?”

“Uhhhhhhhhh. Yahhhhhhh…”

Kids these days will never know the joy of picking up a phone in another room to eavesdrop on their sibling and then spreading information at school. This was hard to do with a cordless phone, as static blew your cover. Covering the mic on a corded phone with your hand and releasing the trigger like a bomb specialist was the key to successful espionage.

The ability to prank call someone is also gone. Damn caller ID. Damn technology. Damn doorbells with cameras take away the fun of Ding Dong Ditching.

There’s only one way to find out…