Member-only story
Must Love Monkey Bars
A playdate personal ad
My name is Emily Walters. I’m nine and three-quarters and I’m seeking an after school playmate in the Westlake Park area.
I am available Tuesdays and Thursdays after four.
On Mondays my mom makes me play soccer which I hate more than anything on this planet, even more than eating fish or brushing my hair.
I can’t do Wednesdays either because on Wednesdays I go to my dad’s house.
On Fridays I stay at Nana and Papa’s but I can still play sometimes, especially if Nana says I’m “too full of beans” and the pool is still closed in their building. I used to play with Eleanor S. on Fridays because she lives in the same building but lately her parents have been dragging her to synagogue on Friday nights because she’s studying for her Bat Mitzvah. And also Eleanor is becoming too boy crazy for my liking.
I am looking for someone who loves monkey bars. We can take turns watching each other do tricks or you could just watch me, which is preferred. I hate dresses and love animals. I’m seeking a playmate who isn’t afraid to get dirty or act silly. Ask yourself this question: is tooting hilarious? If your answer is no, please don’t bother responding to this ad.
