What Made You Have Four Children?
I can say unequivocally, it was my penis.
‘Cause it sure wasn’t my brain. I sometimes wish it was somebody else’s penis though, that way I could claim child support.
But you can’t win them all.
I envy those people who have “evolved” to the point they do not feel the need to rear a DNA-name carrier. Because that ultimately is what we are doing … we can say it is lots of other things, but it is all animal instinct and hard wiring.
Nobody would choose the costs, the hassle, the worry, and the anxiety associated with children if they were thinking rationally. Children are our greatest cost centre and my penis has a lot of explaining to do.
I knew I was in trouble the moment I fell in love with my wife. I say fell in love because previously I had sort of admired her. We worked together. I was her boss.
And then one day, after 4 years, I realised I had fallen hopelessly in love with her. She was the sales manager of my food manufacturing company, and bloody good at selling too. That’s if I left her alone for a hot minute. I used to constantly call her for a “sales update”. In truth I could not give a tiny rat’s left bollock about sales, I simply wanted to speak to her. It was pathetic.
