Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II Warns Citizens of the Former United States: Stop Celebrating July 4th Immediately or Face Charges
On a matter of the utmost urgency, specifically the failure to adhere to laws set forth after the recent revocation of independence by celebrating July 4th.
In a predawn broadcast, Queen Elizabeth II demanded that citizens of the former U.S. complied with the laws set forth when their independence was revoked or face life in prison for committing High Treason. The text of the address is as follows:
Royal Announcer: Her Britannic Majesty Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, and the former United States of America, Head of The Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith.
Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II: To the citizens of the former United States of America. You were informed on November 8, 2016 of the revocation of your independence and the immediate restoration of the monarchy. On that day, the U.S. and all of its commonwealths, with the exception of Illinois which I find too cold, and unpleasant and having too large a criminal element to rectify in a cost effective manner, became once again, a part of what is now called the United Kingdom of…
