IMPEACHMENT BOMBSHELL: New Revelation Suggests Dems Can Remove Trump from Office by Winning Election
Just hours after the senate voted to acquit Trump of both charges levied against him, a stunning revelation has rocked the Democratic Party, sending shockwaves through the impeachment proceedings and giving new life to the glum lot who had all but given up on any hope of removing Trump from office.
In a closed doors session inside the Democratic house chamber earlier today, an anonymous whistleblower made the courageous assertion that Trump can still, indeed, be removed from office, should Dems find a way to miraculously prevail in the upcoming election.
“It’s like a bigger impeachment trial, is what I’m told,” said Nancy Pelosi, excitedly re-ordering a pallet of commemorative pens from Amazon. “Except this time, it’s based on popularity, which, if my Myspace friends list is any indication, is currently at its highest tally since 2004.”
Though we have little information on the whistleblower’s identity, they are believed to be a Postmates delivery driver, who happened to deliver a luke-warm basket of falafels to the chamber of crestfallen dems just as they received the news that Trump had, once again, thwarted their latest attempt to relieve him of The Presidency.
When asked by our reporters if they had any candidates who they thought could defeat Trump, none of the democrats in attendance offered any further insight, though reporters from The Penny Press noted that the muffled cries of Bernie Sanders could be heard emanating from what appeared to be a potato sack stuffed underneath Elizabeth Warren’s desk.
Said Mr. Sanders, “I’m still here.”
Upon being informed by our staff that winning the general election would require a lawful vote of “the people,” Dems responded by angrily overturning the monopoly board, sending the Republicans’ plastic hotels (of which there were, at this point, many) skidding across the floor, before storming out of the chamber.
Originally published at https://thepennypress.press on February 5, 2020.
