How to be Patient with Yourself
After graduating, it’s tough to take your time
One of the hardest skills to master in life is learning to stay patient. It’s only after graduating a year ago that I’m starting to overcome my struggles with it, and I’m finally learning to become more patient with myself.
You see, I’ve decided to pick my paths instead of sticking with the social standard norm of getting a 9–5. I’m not earning lots of money (yet), but I’m enjoying what I’m doing, and that what’s most important.
But here’s the kicker — progress isn’t rapid.
This morning I was distant from myself, my partner and my best friend. What was wrong with me?! Nothing. Ok, nothing much… There are just days when you’re off, right?
I skipped yoga (that says it all) so I was not in my natural state of serenity to kickstart the day. I ended up being off with others around me because I felt frustrated at my current progress.
Coming to Berlin, I want to teach yoga, I want to write, I want to collaborate and create. It gets all a bit too much because sometimes you don’t feel like you’re progressing, but you are. I guess I wanted to see the progress right away this morning, but it doesn’t just happen like that.
Do you ever wake up in panic mode or feel the need to get everything done asap? Want the writing done and dusted? It’s natural yet manageable. Be patient.
Practise adding doses of patience in daily life, so you stay on your track. Here’s how:
Set Good Intentions
When rising, it’s essential to bring in positive intentions for the forthcoming hours. If not, you could end up in mixed sorts all day long.
I like looking at Instagram because I only follow positive profiles. Seeing a few bible verses and encouraging quotes makes me smile and not want to run a mile. I then share some screenshots with friends, family and clients because I enjoy giving out good vibes. Good karma, no drama. Sharing love is better than keeping it to yourself because it gives life meaning and purpose.
You could simply scroll through Instagram and find some uplifting quotes. Screenshot the quote and make it your mantra. It can be that easy.
If you resonate with something, take the measure to bring it to life. Embrace something that taps into your self-awareness because it will engage with your inner light.
If you already start the day scrolling, then make it worth your while. Why not? You have more to gain than to strain at. Look at Instagram accounts that help you along the way and make your day.
Set 3 goals a day. Make sure they are short-term, so they can be completed by the end of the upcoming day.
I like to do this because it restricts me to a “doable” approach, rather than an endless to-do list shattering my mind apart from the very start.
Some examples of mine include things like doing the washing (yes, it always gets in the way), or to stay relaxed and smile at people.
Goals can be personal and practical, they don’t have to be crazy. It can be healthy to set to-do lists but they might be overwhelming when there is so much to tick off. The main point is to keep it simple.
The goals don’t have to be big and boisterous, they can be small and succinct.
They can consist of stretching every 30 minutes — proven to get your metabolism rate back to normal because it slows down by 90% when sat down for half an hour. If you get up for a mere 5-minute stroll around, everything will go back to normal. Amazing, right!?
Movement is medicine. Movement is magic. This is based on Japanese tradition that I learnt from the book Ikigai.
The best advice I can give is to be intentional with what you want to achieve in the day. Don’t be so hard on yourself if not all of them are completed — the point is to test and try yourself. Praise yourself no matter where you are at, what matters most is that you tried.
Set yourself little reminders to raise levels of happiness and put yourself back into the business. These reminders could be something on your phone that are set during the day.
Here are some examples:
Look up or outside the window every once in a while — you’ll be surprised how much peace and perspective you find within nature.
On your way home buy flowers or a plant. Even better, by them for somebody else.
Make the reminders something that will lift your spirits with little effort involved. It’s the little things remember. I tend to send letters or postcards to friends (if and when I have the time of course), of whom I haven’t seen in a while. It’s a kind gesture and I love the feeling of when they receive it.
I have also set reminders before to ring my mum or grandma. Make it things that will thrive in love, care and consideration.
Remember: reminders are not goals. Look at them as little love notes to yourself.
As I said in setting goals, stretching can work miracles.
Stretching slowly can take you into a state of patience and power. As you stretch, you are consumed by the satisfying feeling. The more you do it, the more you are in it. The more mobility being acquired, the more patience is being inspired.
You must be patient when stretching because of its slow, careful movement.
I like to go easy and stretch my body when necessary. It recharges me. It brings me back to now. It’s like pushing a reset button to be ready again for whatever it is you need to tackle. Even if that’s just side stretching in a seated position.
Praying is my way of coping. I pray when I’m in dismay. I pray when I’m grateful. I pray whenever, wherever because I know that God is listening.
When I’m going crazy and feel time-pressured, I come to God with my concerns. I remember the words that ring with my will: Love is patience, love is kind.
Sometimes it’s a struggle to know what to pray for. Allow God to speak to you and string the words together.
“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” Romans 8:26 (NIV)
There you have it: my motives to inspire patience in daily life. Just remember that patience is a process, as you progress towards peace.