Two Rebeccas, Many Approaches, One Goal

I became Facebook friends with Rebecca Bratten Weiss about a year and a half ago, when I saw she was being vilified by the far right LifeSiteNews.com, I site I was previously proud to have my articles reprinted by until they went so far to the right on issues beyond abortion. It’s not merely LifeSiteNews.com. Rebecca is often the topic of articles which spend time criticizing her rather than true abortion advocates, including Church Militant.

It’s articles like those from LifeSiteNews.com and Church Militant which actually make me see Rebecca’s arguments that much more clearly, even if I do not necessarily agree with her argument.

Rebecca and I disagree on many things, including strategies to decrease the rate and need for abortions. But, I like to emphasize that regardless of one’s views on just about anything else, if someone is committed to ending abortion, I am proud to be right there with them on this issue. Rebecca has also led me to reflect on where I stand on my own views, challenging me and leading me to consider another viewpoint, or strengthening my views after having thoroughly examined my viewpoint enough.

I’m often telling my pro-choice Democratic husband about Rebecca and how she has gotten me to think, and how I wish the pro-life movement would stop vilifying her. I think he and my friends from all different perspectives on abortion could really learn something from Rebecca.

I was excited to talk to Rebecca via email about her views on abortion. Here are the responses she emailed to me. I’ve also added my own responses.

How would you describe yourself and your pro-life views? Or do you prefer not to use labels?

RBW: Honestly, I’ve reached the point at which I want to step outside the pro-life / pro-choice paradigm entirely, and look at the scenario from a completely different perspective. Up until recently, I was kind of in an “acknowledge legitimate concerns of both sides” ideological place, but the problem with that is you keep being dragged into having to defend yourself against the charge of fraternizing too much with the enemy. I’ve had pro-lifers send me extremely nasty messages. I’ve had pro-choicers make all kinds of assumptions about me based on the pro-life label. This bickering is a waste of time. What I’d rather do is take a holistic view that acknowledges the complexity of human sexuality and the vulnerability of the woman’s bodily experience, as well as the sanctity and irreplaceability of all life — but not in this obsessed “must keep living things alive at all costs” way, which frankly is a little too Voldemort for my taste.

I don’t really have a label at the moment. Whenever I figure one out, I’ll announce it! The pro-life label is too stained with racist and sexist affiliations, and the pro-choice label is too allied with indifference towards unborn life.

RDG: I have been pro-life my entire life. As a freshman at Fordham University, I joined right up with the Respect for Life club on campus. The more I learned through researching, reading, and attending conferences about abortion, the more pro-life I became, not just for the sake of the unborn child, but for the sake of the mother who could likewise be harmed by abortion. Experiencing two unplanned pregnancies myself also really gave me a perspective on what mothers facing unplanned pregnancies go through, and how abortion can harm them, but that they also really need support. I’m okay with the pro-life label, though I can see where others take issue with it.

What is the best way to work towards reducing abortion?

RBW: First of all, look at what works. We know that social safety nets work (look at Switzerland) but also that they alone are not enough. We also know that bans tend not to work (look at Pakistan). A combination of prudent restriction with robust social safety programs seems to be efficacious, but we also genuinely need to build a culture of wonder and reverence before life — all life, not just born, not just human. And reverence for life means also reverence for, instead of fear of, death. A lot of the misconceptions about laws pertaining to so-called “late term abortion” exist because of this modern control-oriented dread of death as the enemy of life, when in reality death is interwoven with life.

We also need to get over our obsession with perfection — which is connected with fear of death — and which drives ableism, which contributes not only to abortion but to the kind of libertarian “each person for themselves” mindset in which the disabled get sacrificed in an artifice of Darwinism.

RDG: I’m all for social safety nets, which is where I may disagree with my fellow self-identifying Republicans and conservatives. Without such programs though, and federal paid family leave, we cannot expect abortion to become unthinkable. It is a conservative viewpoint not only to care for the unborn and their mothers as some of the most vulnerable amongst us, but for the mother and child once that child is born. Education which does emphasize abstinence while also teaching about contraception is another important factor. Contraception can fail, which should be emphasized to reduce such a reliance on contraception where pregnancy may be unthinkable that women will turn to abortion if/when their contraception fails. This does not necessarily mean taxpayer funded contraception, however. I do believe in teaching personal responsibility there when it comes to those who can afford contraception paying for it themselves.

Does the United States need to tighten its relaxed abortion laws? Does this mean overturning Roe/Doe & Casey?

RBW: We have ridiculously lax abortion laws, compared with other developed nations. And this needs to change, but the changes need to be made by the people who actually understand the complexities of female reproduction and childbirth. Not GOP politicians. Not activists who have never experienced pregnancy. Not people who are so brainwashed they think all pro-choicers just want to kill babies.

The restrictions also need to be accompanied by social programs to assist at-risk women. Because, usually, when a woman gets an abortion, it’s because she believes it is her only way out of a difficult or desperate or even life-threatening situation. A lot of libertarian-style pro-lifers are all “u go girl” and “you’re tough, you can do it.” And that is just delusional. It’s like telling a crippled person “you got this, get up and walk!” — without ever lending them a helping hand.

Oh, and a free ultrasound, or a few extra diapers or maternity clothes aren’t going to cut it. In order to have viable choices other than abortion we need to offer women comprehensive medical coverage, paid maternity leave, safe homes to escape abuse, cash and food assistance. We also need to eradicate the culture of shaming single mothers or regarding pregnant women as a drag in the workplace.

RDG: I’m glad that Rebecca and I at least agree with each other that the United States has absurd laws on abortion. Many of our politicians are also beholden to the abortion lobby, meaning groups like Planned Parenthood and NARAL which oppose virtually any and all abortion regulations or restrictions. The United States is only one of seven nations (out of 196!) which allows for elective abortions past 20-weeks, or halfway through pregnancy. The reason it is so difficult for states to pass certain pro-life laws is because of Roe v. Wade and its companion case of Doe v. Bolton. The 1973 case was upheld in 1992 by Planned Parenthood v. Casey, which created the standard that women must not face an “undue burden” when seeking to access abortion.

What is hurting the cause the most?

RBW: Right now? It’s adoration of Donald Trump. A serial philanderer, multiply accused predator, open sexist, long-time racist — a man who has assuredly been the cause of many abortions — THIS is our pro-life hero? No way. The rest of the world now sees clearly that the mainstream pro-life movement has abandoned its own leftist pacifist roots, and become a cult of patriarchy and control of women’s bodies.

But it’s not just Donald Trump. It’s that the majority of people with “pro-life” after their name are the same who shout bigoted things about immigrants and have a complete lack of consistency on other life issues.

Pro-lifers, in short, are hurting the cause the most. They are the reason why abortion is still so rampant. And they refuse to budge one inch to do what would actually work to save unborn lives.

And in response to the irrational and aggressive approaches of pro-life groups, democrats have really become mindlessly devoted to abortion as a final cause, instead of sticking with the “safe, legal, and rare” language that makes far more sense. I think they’re losing some in the “naive center” due to this.

RDG: Outlets, organizations, and individuals which are obsessed with being so to the right on other issues hurts the pro-life cause. I mean those who would oppose abortion while also opposing federal paid family leave and social safety nets. There’s a difference between advocating for personal responsibility and having unrealistic expectations. I believe Catholic adoption agencies should be able to adopt children out based on their faith, which means adopting children out to married heterosexual couples. That does not mean, however, we need to obsess over how wrong homosexuality is, or what problems we see those who truly are pro-life with us may have.

Can you tell me more about your opposition to legislation proposed by the GOP?

RBW: This is a really broad question! But when it comes to abortion-related legislation, I think they seed each item with something so unpalatable there is no way the majority of educated centrists would want to sign on. They do this so they can keep saying “look, the democrats are the party of abortion!” And they need abortion to remain legal for precisely this reason.

RDG: While I support many GOP-led bills, I am appreciative of Rebecca’s perspective as to why they may fail, and how they could be made stronger.

What are some other pro-life policies, goals, legislation we should be advocating for?

RBW: Anything pertaining to saving our eco-systems and working towards nuclear disarmament. It won’t make much difference which abortion-related procedures are or aren’t legal if we bring on another mass extinction or blow ourselves up.

RDG: Get on board with federal paid family leave being a bipartisan project!

How can pro-lifers be more whole life?

RBW: Work to end capital punishment, welcome immigrants, fight poverty, enact gun legislation, oppose war.

That’s just the start, though. Being whole-life really is a matter of one’s whole life. It has to do with one’s stance towards creation as a whole. One should stand in awe of how complex and beautiful life is — instead of regarding most of it as something just here for our use or gratification.

RDG: Truly work to make abortion unthinkable. This means empathizing with vulnerable women facing unplanned pregnancies and other difficult circumstances. Pregnancy centers fill a void and deserve our financial support and/or our time to help women. It boggles my mind how some pro-lifers could be against federal paid family leave. The same goes with having some sort of social safety net.

Feel free to read and learn more about Rebecca through her Facebook page, Patheos writing, and her website.