IT’S SATIRE (I’M NOT A CREEP)
8 Trends I Picked Up While People Watching at a Restaurant
Friday afternoons are flawless for day drinking
#1. Ex-Machina.
If the floor was clean, my jaw would be on it. Most individuals had only one device open, a phone or a laptop. No multitasking with four screens like we were stock brokers. Or pretend gamers starting a YouTube channel.
Maybe it was the music, but I didn’t hear any smartwatches dinging either.
#2. Simulated Work.
One doesn’t need to be an expert at reading microexpressions. It’s all in the posture. We know pretending to be busy because we’ve all done it.
Why here? Who’s recording? The phantom of productivity is strong with us.
#3. Not-AI Girlfriend.
Two tables across, a man was having a virtual date. With a human woman. Tablet propped against stacked condiment bottles, they were immersed in vibrant dialogue. He got dressed, left his home, and ordered pasta.
Imagine the dedication. We’re not getting replaced anytime soon.
