THE PUNCHY PICKLE

Sharp satire, brined to perfection. Serving up the absurd — one punchy take at a time. Dill with it. Find me on Bluesky @thepunchypickle.bsky.social

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Nine Reasons I’m Voting For Donald Trump in 2024 — Because One Round Wasn’t Enough

Jess
THE PUNCHY PICKLE
Published in
6 min readJan 26, 2024

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He’s a National hero

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

I grew up in a super strict Evangelical house — and even though I’m a lesbian, married with a family, I think Trump is the hope our nation has been looking for.

These are dire times. When we cast our votes it’s important we make sure we cast them with the greatness of America in the back of our minds — and Trump carries that greatness inside him.

I believe in the power of white supremacy

We caucasians have always dominated — and should continue to dominate this country.

Sure, we weren’t the first to inhabit the land, but we sure cleaned up the place after those nature-loving peace-seeking hippies we found when we got here!

Celebrating the demise of their society and culture is one of my favorite holidays — cheers to wiping out an entire population for our personal gain! God bless the USA!

White will always reign victorious. It’s God’s will. Trump will lead us into the continuing rise of the white population.

Hopefully overtime we will filter out the low-breeding and our country will be as it once was. Embracing slavery, raising our glasses to the conquering of the indigenous…

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THE PUNCHY PICKLE
THE PUNCHY PICKLE

Published in THE PUNCHY PICKLE

Sharp satire, brined to perfection. Serving up the absurd — one punchy take at a time. Dill with it. Find me on Bluesky @thepunchypickle.bsky.social

Jess
Jess

Written by Jess

I write whatever comes to mind. Follow me on Bluesky @jesslx.bsky.social. Check out my publication, The Punchy Pickle, for daily satire.

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