Tesla To Add Body Kits To Optional Extras List In Effort To Make Ghettos Green
In a surprise announcement today, Tesla and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk has added body kits to all optional extras lists for in-production Tesla models.
Speaking from a prototype Iron Man-style suit, Mr Musk expressed his hope for the seemingly strange addition to the product line. “Ghettos are the key to a green future. But we’re not going to get there while they’re driving around in large pickups, fuel guzzling Dodge Darts, Lexus GS’s, and the myriad of other nameless shitboxes that prowl the streets,” he said, carefully placing a solid gold chain around his neck.
“Ya’ll dig?” he yelled to the crowd. At the time of writing, there have been roughly 10,000 orders from people who have “dug” the Musk.
Mr Musk exited the press briefing by blowing a hole in the roof with a dual blast from his palm-mounted laser beams and flew off into the afternoon sky.
Three people were injured from the falling debris caused by Mr Musk’s exit.
Matt Querzoli’s Adventures in Blokedom is the satirical publishing arm of The Quintessential Q. Follow his writing blog, his letters to strangers blog or his blog blog if you liked the post, or even the bloke himself if this tickled your proverbial pickle.
