worrying vs. mantras
why it doesn’t help and what you should do instead
Have you ever felt so worried that it made you ill but you didn’t know how to stop?
Do your worries keep you up at night?
Do you feel consumed either by the past or fearful for the future?
And:
What if your worst-case scenario has happened to you once?
Does this justify Future You worrying?
Worrying: revisited
Worrying is actually very counterproductive, so what makes it so attractive? I mean, why would we waste so much time if there wasn’t some form of reward in it for us?
Ok — don’t stop reading yet. I can hear your protests: why would I want to worry? It’s not as though I choose to constantly review my thoughts, anxieties, and fears.
But ….what if that *were* the case?
What if I told you that you can break that habit by becoming more aware of the nature of our thoughts?
And there is nothing wrong with all the advice you have probably heard a hundred times until now.
You KNOW this, so why don’t you practice this?
Perhaps it’s because you think that relaxation can be found on holiday. A far-away, sun-filled destination with views.
Or maybe you are overwhelmed and don’t know where to start.
My theory is that this is often because we don’t really know ourselves. We choose to ignore our patterns or habits and anticipate better in the future.
I mean to say that we wake up and decide to do it all differently, starting today. Decide: yeah, let’s get up and run every day at 6 am. Sounds good, right? Well, not really if you are *not* a morning person…
Know thyself
How to go about doing this, you ask?
Obviously, writing is #1 in my book to discovering where you are, relative to your goals. Or intentions. Or hopes.
Start by grabbing your fave pen and a beautiful journal (or notebook or piece of paper) and write it down: What gives me JOY?
This is a much-often overlooked an integral part of who we are, our Self, at the core. When we can figure out what ensures that we enter a state of flow, we can apply it to the rest of our lives.
And when you have discovered what this looks like for you (kudos to you!), you are ready to take an honest leap into your dream future. And I mean: really honest. Stripped done to the bones kind of honesty.
What makes you glow?
And how often do you do it?
Probably less often than you would like. Think about this for a minute: you are graced with the richness of knowing what you NEED to do and still don’t. Never mind all the shoulds on your list, like self-care….
Maybe you even worry about whether or not you spend the “right” amount of time doing what you should.
Stop doing; start contemplating
For some reason, worrying seems to go hand-in-hand with wanting to take (nervous) action. Which, let’s be honest, folks, is rarely a good idea!
There are a few principles of Yoga which I would like to address:
1. Ahimsa: a.k.a. non-violence and the first principle of Yoga. One thing I learned for sure when I was in India for my internship: worrying is himsa or violence. Umm, you talking to me? Yes, he was. It’s aggressive to yourself to worry your pretty little head so much. And you would never talk to a friend like that!
2. Mantra: the science of mantra or japa as it’s called in Sanskrit, is designed to effectively change our neural pathways — if practiced correctly. The principle is that when we recite a mantra repeatedly (yup, also a practice) we can actually change the structure of our brains, making it possible to act, think and even feel differently. (You can see where I am going with this: more useful than worrying which is everywhere and nowhere at the same time).
3. Contemplation: when we become aware of the universe around us and our place in it, it makes it easier to start to see the big picture. Contemplation is an integral part of the eightfold path of Yoga, which was designed to make us feel not only connected to the universe and each other, but most importantly: to OURSELVES.
Please note: these are all practices requiring guidance from a qualified teacher or Yoga therapist, to ensure that you apply them in the safest way possible.
What’s in it for me, i.e., what do I need to do *now*?
Ok, so I know I just said: stop doing. But I am also well aware it’s not really in our human nature to stop doing it. This is like telling your mind to stop thinking. And who’s the one thinking, anyway?
Ahimsa: so how do we bring this seemingly esoteric practice in a (for most people) strange language into practice?
We can start by observing (giving your mind something to do) which areas of our lives require attention. By this, I mean, in which parts of our lives might we be more kind to ourselves?
Do you look at yourself in the mirror and wink?
Do you smile and say: “What’s cooking good looking?”
I know it’s cheesy, but when we can appreciate ourselves in every nook and cranny of our human form at this moment in time, we are also able to radiate love toward others. And when we can connect with this Universal Love, starting with ourselves, you will less often find yourself in Worryville.
Mantra: ok, so this one may feel a bit more complicated. I will break it down for you. It’s about the PRACTICE, not necessarily having received an initiation into a tradition (with a personal mantra).
Start with the So Hum mantra, a great stepping stone for later. Literally, “So Hum” means “I am that,”; the intention being to connect with the universe. Seeing things from a Higher perspective allows us to gain insight into what we might not see from nearby.
You can combine mantra (either aloud or recited in your mind) with awareness of the breath. Or this may be too much at the moment, and you can focus on the mantra; the important thing is to feel what you need.
The idea behind the mantra is that when practiced on the daily, we are repeatedly calming our nervous system and activating various brain centers. The benefit?
“Chanting mantras is an ancient practice that calms your mind and soul. Scientific studies have found that chanting mantras like om for 10 minutes can descrease anxiety and depressive symptoms in the human body.”
Contemplation, or meditation, is a tool to increase awareness, either while we meditate or as we go about our day. The point of contemplation is to increase our focus to benefit from an uninterrupted flow of concentration.
So what’s the difference between meditation and contemplation, as they are two separate steps of the eightfold path?
The difference is that concentration (dharana in Sanskrit) is about one-pointed attention, and meditation (dhyana in Sanskrit) is about being next-level aware without a point of focus. Basically, practicing concentration prepares us for meditation.
And don’t worry if it doesn’t feel achievable — single-pointed focus? And awareness without focus? There is a reason these are a practice. And the myth of “having no thoughts” is nonexistent.
Meditation is the art of seeing, recognizing, and warmly welcoming thoughts…and then showing them the door. The greatest lesson I learned from my Himalaya Tradition teacher is saying to any thoughts that come up: “Do you need me now, or can you come back later?”. What a relief!
Remember: even the most advanced practitioners have had a few moments without thought. I believe it has been said that 11 seconds without thought is an achievement only experienced by a few.
Next time you are worried, please consider what else you can do with your energy and time. You’re needed in this life, and when you are worried you might not be aware of how deeply true that is.
And if you need help with this, please feel free to contact me.
You’re not alone — I am here to help.
