The Pitch: Jennifer Aniston‘s Trans-Rachel Friends Reunion

Surefire programming for the post-Dolezal world

As a Content Creator based in Los Angeles, I am constantly thinking in pitch mode. So when Rachel Dolezal happened, I couldn’t help but dream of all the beautiful television opportunities it could create. A reality show is the obvious angle. Too obvious. I have to live on the bleeding edge of tv innovation to sell ideas.

I say take this story, place it in a fictional setting and capitalize on current 90s nostalgia. This is the long-awaited reunion episode of Friends!

THE PITCH:

It is a decade after the finale and Ross is meeting a private investigator at Central Perk, the gang’s old hangout. The dick claims that he has finally found Rachel, Ross’ wife who disappeared barely a week after their wedding shown in the final episode. Ross is ecstatic, for the old crew wants to reunite and exchange witty banter but will not, cannot, do it without their beloved friend Rachel. He travels to Spokane to bring her home.

When Ross arrives, he is SHOCKED to walk into an office that has not one, not two, but three African-Americans in it. In the ten years he lived in Manhattan, he may have seen two! And that was in passing. He asks for Rachel and they send him to the back office. He enters the room slowly and sitting at a desk with curly hair and a pierced nose is… JENNIFER ANISTON IN BLACKFACE!

(Cut to commercial)

Okay, we’re back. Rachel explains that she’d felt so bad living in NYC while never interacting with black folk that she’s decided to make up for it by heading the NAACP in Spokane as a transracial black woman, which is a thing you can do now in 2015.

As I’m thinking: in this show, Spokane should only have black people in it. So much so that white people watching will be like, “I’ve been to Spokane —there are white people there. Where are the white people?” They’re just going to have to deal with it.

Anyway, that’s where I’m at. I have a pitch meeting Friday and, fingers crossed, you’ll be watching it all play out this Fall.

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