Self Control: The Missing Link to Living The Life You’ve Always Dreamed
“He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.” ―Lao Tzu
Self-control is the kryptonite to all human life.
Who wants self-control when we can enjoy all of life’s pleasures?
Sadly, we have come to believe that self-control works against us. But if we truly understood it, we would see that its’ a tool that fights on our behalf.
Do you have a goal to lose some weight?
Do you desire to increase the richness of your relationships?
Do you dream of paying off your student loans and getting out of debt?
Do you want to see the world and live life on your terms?
The achievement of your goals is dependent mainly upon your self-control.
Self-control is the internal governor that helps us to manage our inner urges, cravings, and desires.
We are human, so we have many stimuli that affect us each day. But many of those urges would distract us or move us away from the goals and purposes we have set out for our lives.
Self-control is harnessing your will so that you stay the course you ultimately desire for yourself.
The enticing smell of food, the blinking lights of advertisements on the screen, the thirst for one more drink at the bar or one more trip to the kitchen are all inherently neutral things. But mindlessly giving in to these enticements can prove harmful long-term.
Self-control helps you to navigate, momentary urges so that you can live your life on purpose.
1. You Need Self-Control Because You Can’t Trust Yourself.
We are most often our own worst enemy.
While we all know it’s true, we still believe the hype about doing whatever feels good and following our heart. In other words, you are prone to do things you don’t intend to do.
You will plan to get up at 5 am, but you will desire to bask in the comfort of your warm bed. You will plan to work for an allotted block of time but gnawing at your soul will be the desire to binge on Netflix.
Your desires are always grinding against your goals.
Steven Pressfield would call it Resistance.
That’s because we have become accustomed to immediate satisfaction. We live in an era of instant gratification. We only wait when something is wrong. We have to retrain ourselves to live and think differently.
For long-term success, you must fight against instant gratification.
2. You Need Self-Control Because You’re In Love With Comfort
I’m sure there is scientific proof that good food has supernatural powers. Whether sick, healthy, happy or depressed, food can make anything better.
Comfort food isn’t just a baked casserole, but rather it is a cozy blanket for the soul. Much of your self-control goes out the window when your comfort is challenged.
There are few things in this world that are more seductive than comfort.
But too much comfort will rob you of any progress. You need self-control to fend off the sweet kisses and the warm embrace of comfort.
For long-term growth, you must fight against short-term comfort.
3. You Need Self-Control To Create Movement
A boulder is hardest to move when it is at rest. You are no different. Your natural desires will keep you locked in the same spot, with no movement.
You can have all the dreams in the world, but if we get complacent, it’s easy to settle into your current position with no forward progress.
That’s why so many of us have dreams to travel yet never buy a ticket anywhere. It takes too much energy to take the first step.
Your desires will deceive you into believing that if you stay the same everything will be ok.
But that’s not true. If there is no movement, there is no life. You need to become like a shark if you stop moving you die.
For progress, you need the self-control to fight inertia.
4. You Need Self-Control To Become A Giver
We all love the stories of those who started at the bottom, but no one wants to start at the bottom.
I’m sure I’m not the only one who has dreamed that Hollywood would make a movie based on my life. But, if I were writing the screenplay, the film would be all riches and no rags.
Your base desire is to get all you can for yourself. After all, it’s a dog eat dog world. We don’t all naturally wan to make room for anyone else.
Self-control forces you to take the attention off yourself and focus on someone else.
The most profound impact anyone can make is in the life of someone else. When you focus on people over personal gain, personal gain is inevitable.
For maximum impact, you need self-control to fight selfish ambition.
5. You Need Self-Control To Go From Good To Great.
Even your best intentions aren’t enough.
As the new year is approaching, you have written your goals, renewed your gym membership and cleaned your fridge. The problem is, it’s only a momentary change. After a few weeks and a couple of hiccups, we’ll scrap the whole plan.
These are short-term changes at best. When you make drastic positive changes like these, we get a mental high and feel a false sense of accomplishment.
Good desires must be maintained with long-term self-control.
For long-term improvement, you need self-control to fight short-term solutions.
Get A Grip On Self Control
When we hear the term self-control visions of grueling diets and boredom come to mind.
I think this is a sad fact.
Self-control is the key that unlocks all the dreams we hold dear.
What we fail to realize is when we give in to every whim and neglect self-control we are delaying the life we dream of living.
Self-control means governing our lives in order to to get the maximum joy and satisfaction out of life. Of course, that may mean short-term sacrifices, but what’s a short-term sacrifices in light of a life filled with purpose and meaning?
Self-control is the link we’ve been missing.
In The Rough is a publication seeking to engage who do life in the streets. We luh God and we luh the culture.
We’re 80’s and 90’s babies who are Christians seeking God and grinding to make a difference in our neighborhoods and cities. We’re not satisfied to live a sterilized, passive existence.
We want to live a life where our life and lips match up. We love the local church, and want to love our neighbors, and want to see that happen over and over again.
We serve the Creator of creativity, which means we want good movies, good music, and dope art. And we are always on the lookout to see what God is doing in the world so that we can be a part of it.
