“We Should All Aspire to be Muses:” An Interview With Thelma and the Sleaze
July 13th, 2024 I sat down with LG, lead singer and guitarist of Southern rock group Thelma and the Sleaze, to talk about inspiration and music and the important shit of life on a rickety stoop outside Proud Larry’s in Oxford, MS.
The Sleazes Lineup:
- LG, on vocals and guitar
- Hotsauce, on drums
- Coochie Coochie, on organ and keyboard
- Tinkerbell, on bass
So, we’re gonna start with the latest stuff and work our way backwards because the newer pieces are probably fresher in your mind. We’ll cover the three main albums and end with a quickfire round. Sound good?
Holey Water (2023)
- You had a three-year gap between Sacred As Hell and your latest album, Holey Water. I noticed a bit more length, maybe more controlled anger in this new one. But what do you think, if anything, changed in your intentions or process between the albums?
Well Sacred As Hell I recorded at my house by myself during COVID, so I did that on a laptop at home and I sent the songs to a drummer in L.A. and she played on them. She sent me the stereo files, and I just kinda popped them in. But that album was just kinda like, you know, me saying no matter what I’m gonna make music. I’m gonna be creative.
And then this new album — I didn’t actually even intend to make Holey Water — but I was like, well I got offered studio time at a place that’s about thirty minutes from here in Water Valley. They offered us some studio time to come and do the record, so I kinda threw together a lot of demos that I had. (I usually have like twenty songs just kinda waiting around, you know.) And so we put it together, and so yeah: one I made at my house, and the other I made at a pretty professional studio.
Do you feel like anything changed in what you wanted to say really between the two albums, or was it more a continuation of the themes?
Yeah, I think the Sacred As Hell album, like you know — a lot of my songs come from conversations — so like at that point I’d had a really interesting phone call with one of my ex’s, and that’s what made me write “Good Gilrs,” you know. And then “In Prison” was like, you know the pandemic felt like prison because you couldn’t leave your house, or do anything, and then yeah, so those songs were just like about those things. Well, “In Pictures” is also on that album, you know, because you felt like you were living through pictures and social media rather than real life at that point.
Holey Water, I wrote the majority of those songs when I was in a very, very quick relationship with an exotic dancer. And she was just a muse. The album, most of the songs, I wrote when “we were entangled” as Jada Pinkett Smith would say, and it wasn’t even that tumultuous or like crazy. It was pretty chill actually, but it was just kinda like whenever I’d be around her, I don’t know, some women are like that. They’re just muses. I mean we should all aspire to be muses, really, because it’s like there really are some women — you hang out with them and they just make you wanna write songs. I don’t know what it is. Something about talking to them. Something about the poetic nature of their demeanor, it just, it inspires things. It’s nice.
2. I think “Faster” is so clever; I love a song with a lot of variety, but the purposeful variety here is just so fun. Talk about the process of writing it, the inspiration, or just what it means to you.
Well, I think “Faster,” you know… you know when you’re with someone, and you kinda wanna speed up to the point where you’re like no “we’re together now, let’s be together now.” And it’s just like, I’ve always had more of a standoffish vibe where it’s like we could hang out or we could not hang out; and I feel like women, least the ones I’ve had relations with, have been attracted to me because of that. Cause I am very like, you know, let’s slow down, let’s have our space, you do your thing, I’ll do my thing, if it works out, whatever. Um, so that was kinda the vibe. And I really love P.J. Harvey, and her earlier stuff, and she did a four-track album on a TASCAM recorder. So I kinda wanted to try to get that kinda vibe.
Anyways, I record every song by myself in my house. I’ll do the drums, the bass, and the stuff, then send it to my band and they play on it in the studio. But that song sounds so much different than it did on the demo because the bass player, he just kinda was filling in because our bass player didn’t make it to the studio, and he just took it in a different direction. Yeah, and it was a good experience in some ways because it’s like I’m not often challenged in that way where it’s like “well, it’s not wrong what you’re doing, but it’s not really the vibe of the song.” But it was cool. I like it. I like the way it turned out. Honestly it pushes a little bit more, which is kind of the energy of the song anyways. And then at the end of it I was just like, when we recorded it, what if we go really fast now, now that we’ve… yeah haha. So yeah.
3. “Hands Tied” struck me as the saddest song, at least muscially, on the album (and one of my favorites). Talk to me about it. And from a personal perspective too, not just how you wrote this song, how do you deal with heartbreak. Have any advice?
See, that’s the thing. That’s the thing. I am really standoffish and like whatever at the beginning of relationships because I do have a lot of walls, and I’m really good at compartmentalizing my emotions. Like I’ll know this is just sex, or like “okay you were just my girlfriend.” And I’m just really good at doing that. But once I am really with someone, and I feel like I can trust them, or be honest, or open… yeah, I don’t deal with heartbreak very well. I got broken up with three months ago, and I’m still like “ah this hurts so bad.”
So with “Hands Tied” it was like, you know, I love writing really dirty songs that don’t sound dirty. But if you listen to the words to that song, the second verse is very nasty. And yeah, I got to the end of this song, and I kinda just kept repeating “she didn’t mean what she said,” you know, “she didn’t say what she meant.” And the producer guy came in and said, “Well, what did she say,” and I was like “Oh.” So that’s when he prompted, “Well what would you have wanted her to say.” I said, “Well, I guess: I need you. I want you.” And so I added that layer of vocals under that end part and ended up really liking it.
Plus, the melody (I think it has a really beautiful melody) was really important to me. Coochie, who’s here, well, that album for me is just me really trying to show off my Coochie. I mean, she’s an incredible organist, incredible piano player. She does Hammond on that album. She does Wurlitzer on that album. She does it all. And that song especially — I’m a big Tory Amos fan — the way she interpreted my melody and played it on the piano just reminded me of Tory Amos.
But yeah, I love that song. And I think it’s one of my favorite songs I ever wrote. And it’s funny because when I wrote it, it sounded like Creed. And I was kinda disgusted by it, like, “I hate this song.” And I told the girls about it and was like “I don’t know.” Finally I was like, let me see if I can pull it back to a point where it doesn’t sound like frat rock or Three Doors Down. So we did, and I said, let’s take it as far down and as soft as possible. And that’s what we got. And I think it turned out well. I love ballads. I’m a hard rocker, I love to rock hard, but I also love a beautiful ballad. That’s why I love Ozzy. Cause Ozzy has so many beautiful ballads. And people, I think if they’re really hard rockers and they really love hard and fast and they’re a little crazy, that you’re gonna have sad times. Yeah, you gotta have some heartbreak. There’s gonna be some heartbreak. It’s not all beautiful times.
4. Love the instrumental solos in “Easy.” Which comes first though generally when you write music: the lyrics or the music? Which do you work around when you create?
The lyrics. Yeah, usually I come up with a lyric, or the idea of what I want to say first.
That song especially is about how people are so eager to jump on bandwagons and be like “I totally understand this” and “I’m totally in support of that.” And it’s just so easy. Like, you can form your own opinions, you can have your own ideas, you can have conversations with people. You know what I mean? But yeah, I’d like to see more activism and less performative activism. And that’s another song where I feel the lyrics are very simple, but the point is also very clear: I think it’s very easy to just fall in line and say stuff because you think it’s right. And I think it’s bitten people in the ass a lot this year. You have people who’ve said “oh yeah, this person has their shit together,” and find out they’re not a good person. Haha, you know. So you just gotta be careful about that stuff. It’s a lot harder to just get out and have conversations with people and make up your own mind about things.
But yeah, most generally, it’s a lyric or an idea. I either get a line in my head, and I’ll build a song around that line or an idea where it’s like, “Oh I really want to say something about this. What do I say?” And the music usually comes after. Unless it’s like a sick riff. And yeah, conversations are a great way. Sometimes someone will say something to you, and it’ll stick with you, and you’ll just be like, yeah, that’s a great line. Yeah, I’m gonna use that line.
Haha, what is it Picasso said? “Good artists borrow; great artists steal.”
Yeah, I like what Picasso’s daughter said when they were trying to cancel him, being like “So do you think that Picasso is toxic masculinity? Like sexist?” And she, the daughter, just responds, “I don’t know, he’s fucked up to men too.” Yeah, just an all-around asshole.
5. That’s good; haven’t heard that. But nice, that wraps up Holey Water. Before moving on to Sacred As Hell though, you mentioned it earlier, but this was a COVID album, and I wanted to talk about how COVID affected the band and your life. I mean, you couldn’t tour, were alone a lot probably, etc… What do you have to say about that time?
Yeah, yeah, I mean I’m an alcoholic with an addictive personality, so for me this is my drugs every night. I get that adrenaline. I get that dopamine. I get like that high from being on stage. And I play 120 shows a year when I’m not locked in my house, so to go from doing that to being alone for a year…And I’ve smoked since I was twelve unfortunately, so yeah, I was really scared when COVID first happened because I didn’t know what the fuck was gonna happen to me if I got it. So it really freaked me out, and I’m already a germaphobe as it is (I say as I sit in a dumpster balcony with a leaky AC). But yeah, it was just, it was hard for me to come off those drugs that I get every night. This is my drugs. Rock and roll is my drugs. And I didn’t get my drugs for like a whole year.
It’s crazy what it does to your body, touring. I just literally, well you see, someone rear-ended us yesterday. So our back doors don’t open. So I literally had to push the full stack amps through the van to pull them out the side. You know what I mean? I’m exhausted. I’m hot. But when I get out on that stage, even if there’re only two people out there, the power, it’s just like “wahhhhh, I’m ready.” It’s crazy: you’ll be tired and exhausted and hungry and wore the fuck out. But when you get up on that stage, if there’s people there to see you, it’s just like… [breathes deeply] yeah, you know.
Sacred As Hell (2020)
6. Moving on to the album questions, I adore “In Pictures.” We’ve already talked a little bit about it, but is there anything you want to add about what you want to convey with this song? Is it about a specific person or anything?
Yeah, I mean, it was just about missing people, and looking through pictures and all the fun. You know, I mean, you take it for granted, this life we live. This is a special life to be a musician. It sucks a lot. Especially when you spend two grand on a van and some redneck without insurance just slams into the back of you, haha. But there’s never a question of whether I’m gonna give up or go to the show. And we take it for granted. It’s a very special thing we get to do, travel, and meet people, and play music. And when you don’t have it, it was very sad. I missed everybody and I found myself just looking at pictures. Then also it’s just thinking of those sweet moments when you finally meet someone after being alone for a while and it’s just so special, and I was just looking so forward to that when I got out of my house. Having those moments where you stay up talking till the sun comes up and just like, those are like the best, you know.
For sure, for sure. That’s interesting though. When I first listened to it, I mean, I listened to it a couple times, but I kind of had this Gatsby idea in my mind of you looking at pictures of this other person and you were like, “I wish I had been there with them.” Like you wanted to be in their past, and just couldn’t be, and the mourning of that. But that’s completely different, really, from what you’re saying. So yeah, super interesting.
Well, that’s the great thing about songs. If it’s a good song, people can kinda draw their own conclusions and apply it to their own experiences. I don’t think my songs are particulary abstract, but they’re also not super literal, you know what I mean. I’m trying to convey emotion more than recount things most of the time. So yeah, I love that song. And I actually really love the way that demo sounds, and the solo’s really cool.
I also love that song George Harrison has, that Hallelujah song. You guys know that song? That was, when I was kinda talking to the drummer about it, that was the vibe I wanted to catch. And she listened to it — she’s a pig pen, one of my best drummers, but she has really good taste. I do change my sound every song; you know, you have to be a versatile kind of musician, and you have to have a lot of taste and listen to a lot of stuff because I’ll be like “Nineties Aerosmith, George Harrison,” you know like, “The Ronettes. Okay, now we’re gonna do Iron Maiden. Then I wanna do something that sounds like the Pointer Sisters.” Yeah, so you have to be versatile, but I think she did a really good job on those drums.
Yeah, yeah, a collage of stuff. Very nice. My next question is kinda long, so it’ll take me a second to get it all out, but…
7. Confrontation is a big theme in your work —
— Honey, confrontation is a big theme in my life.
Haha, true. True. But it’s prevalent in your work. I mean, you’re gay, you’re a woman, and you’re being those things in the South. You sing, beautifully I add, about your identities in a place many people find to be a repressive part of the country. I mean, “Good Gilrs” is an example of this that caught my ear from the album. So how do you think things have changed since your 2010 formation in relation to these things?
Gosh. I hate to be sad news man, but I think it’s gotten worse. Cause it used to be other people were repressing us, but now I feel queers are repressing each other because like, if you think about the South — Nashville, for instance — and the kind of people that city attracts. They so much move there to go to Christian schools, from Christian houses, with Christian parents, with no diversity. And that’s why they go to Nashville. That’s why their parents send them to Nashville, you know what I mean. They go there because “It’s safe and segregated and there’s lots of good Christan schools.” So you have all these gay people who act like straight people who wanna please their parents, so they’ve become their own repressors. They’ve even made the scene, well, they even police the scene. It’s bizarre. I think we’re in this weird period of time where, and it’s not bad, it’s all just growth, but we’re in this weird period of time where we’re not looking at gay culture as a whole and its history and focusing on some of the ways where it wasn’t super inclusive rather than the things that were cool about it, you know what I mean. And it’s like, okay, we’re gonna have to overcorrect for a while.
But, let’s not let corporations dictate our culture. Let’s not let Jesus-camp rejects dictate our culture. You know what I mean? And let’s not just do things because we’re gay. Like it’s not our whole-ass identity. Like, I don’t need to drink water out of a rainbow bottle. I mean, being gay has not been hard for me. I’m white, I’m femme (I mean, not right now, haha, but you know, no one’s gonna mistake me for a dude at this point). So it’s not that hard for me. I’m not gonna sit here and cry about it. What the worst thing about being gay for me is that I intimidate men on such a level because of my sexual prowess, but that’s their insecurities. It’s not because of me. You’re afraid I’m gonna steal your girlfriend? That’s fine. I am in that season now where I’m gonna start stealing girlfriends. Never done it before, but I feel like this is gonna be my season. I’m gonna be Wario now. I’ve been Mario, but now I’m gonna be Wario.
But yeah, no. I hope we get back to a place where people want community more than performative activism. Where it’s not about “look what we did today” but where you get in the streets because you actually care about other people. And I think that, again, there’s a lot of misogyny in gay culture especially related to how women are treated and how transwomen are treated. And it’s, we gotta lotta learning to do, a lotta growing to do, and I hope this is just a phase. But I think we have kind of, as a gay culture, we have gone a little backwards. That’s how things work though. Right before they get really cool. I mean you think about the 80s versus the 90s, it’s just like sometimes people go “nonono, you can’t do those things” right before things get really cool again. So I hope things get really cool again.
But yeah, being gay is awesome, but it hasn’t been that hard necessarily for me.
8. In listening to “Come Back Now” I thought about how you’re on the road a lot. You don’t have A Home as much as you have The Road. How do you handle leaving people so often? Do you like the lifestyle of passing through peoples’ lives.
I’ll be honest, you know who I hate leaving? This is sad. I’m a thirty-nine-year-old woman, don’t have any friends, don’t have any family where I live. I live alone not too far from here. And yeah, the only thing I’m sad to leave are my dogs. My dogs and my guitars. They love me no matter what. They don’t say, “Oh, you’re being a bitch today.” They say, “Can we go for a walk. I wanna go for a walk. You gonna give us Kibble today right?” It’s easy. I have a hard time with people. But I do really well with dogs.
Do you have a cat?
No, just dogs. My dogs would eat the cats unfortunately. I wish I did have a cat. But dogs are better if someone comes in your house at night anyway, so.
So when you travel and you meet people you’re like “that’s cool” and you’re fine getting back to your dogs and your guitars. It’s not hard passing through lives?
Yeah, I like my autonomy. I’m what you call a curmudgeon, haha. I like being alone. I have a lot of projects. I paint now. So yeah, “Come Back Now,” that song, I wrote when I was hanging out with that muse. I wrote so many good songs when I was hanging out with her. I was driving back, we had a really nice time, it was very romantic, it was a lot of fun. But it was understood that’s all it was. And it was just a good time and it was great. There wasn’t any pressure. You know, cause a lot of dancers, their time is very valuable. They’re not gonna waste it, you know what I mean. So it was like, it was great, and I remember that line just kinda popped into my head “I just wanted to see you before I head down south.” Before I go back to just being alone. Exactly. Going back to my guitars and my dogs. Like this is a nice time, but you know.
And yeah, it was one of those songs. Sometimes when I’m on tour and haven’t been home for a while I just grab my acoustic when I get home and I’ll have something in my head. And some of the best songs I’ve ever written are just right when I get home, and it’s just been in my head, and that was one of them. I’m very proud of that album. That album, it’s the least-produced album, it’s the least money I ever spent on an album. I just recorded it at my house, by myself, with my little laptop. It’s not the greatest sounding album, but the songs, they hit. I mean, Sacred as Hell and Fuck, Marry, Kill are the two albums where people left me the fuck alone, you know what I mean? When you’re in this business, everyone sees you cooking a sandwich and they go “Oh, we could put lettuce on that sandwich. Ooh! Ooh! We could put mayonnaise on that sandwich.” And it’s like no, leave me alone, I’m trying to make a sandwich.
Dude, I mean, yeah. How many times have you heard, “Oh, I bet this right here, what we’re doing, is great inspiration for you, huh?” Haha, and you’re just like no, I need to be alone and, you know, just fucking do it.
Yeah. You know, the hardest thing about being a songwriter is when you date women and they hear a song… like I wrote a song called “High Class Woman.” Well they get upset when you write songs about them that maybe aren’t as powerful as “High Class Woman.” And I just have to be like, “Well, I’m sorry that wasn’t the case. I’m sorry you didn’t make me write that song, but that was a lady that was different than you.” They’re all good songs, but some of them are better than others, and I hope I meet another woman who makes me write a song like “High Class Woman.” That’ll be a good day for me.
I hope you find it, for sure. Nice. But yeah, that’s the end of the Sacred As Hell questions, but before we move on to Fuck, Marry, Kill, we gotta play right? So yeah. I got four rounds.
- Jesus, Pamela Anderson, and Belle from Beauty and the Beast
Wow. Well. This is hard. I am very gay, but I feel like Jesus would have a magic stick, you know, let’s be real. Because whenever I orgasm I say “Jesus Fucking Christ.” So. So you know what I’m gonna say: fuck Jesus, marry Pamela Anderson, and kill Belle. Just because if I was gonna pick a Disney Princess I would probably pick Pocahontas or Sleeping Beauty. I mean, Pocahontas would be great to go camping with. I also like her songs the best. Or the chick from the Hunchback of Notre Dame.
2. Your hottest cousin, Betty Crocker, and the Dalai Lama
Well you can’t fuck your cousin. I don’t know. I’m gonna fuck the Dalai Lama because I feel like these spiritual motherfuckers are gonna take me to a higher plane. Now this is saying I’m bisexual. I’m not bisexual. I am gay. But given the circumstances, I’d fuck the Dalai Lama cause he’d do some crazy shit I’m sure. Then I’m gonna have to marry Betty Crocker because I’m gonna have to get those baked goods; I’m gonna have to get those snacks. That’s gonna be a nice set-up.
Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to kill my hottest cousin. She’s cool. I love my hottest cousin. And she’s definitely my hottest cousin. Blond. From Texas. Drives a Mustang. I mean, I’m not saying she’s hot. It’s just every person I introduce her to goes “Uhh, dude, your cousin’s hot.” But yeah, we do not want to have sex. She’d probably rather die than have sex with me, haha.
3. The Ghost of Christmas Past, a centaur, and Kamala Harris
Oh, that’s easy. Fuck the centaur because horses have huge cocks. Marry Kamala Harris just so she can say “what you think you just fell out of a coconut tree” every day because she cracks me up. And I’m gonna kill the Ghost of Christmas Past.
4. The Headless Horseman, Bette Midler, and Princess Diana
Fuck Bette Midler because she’s hot. Marry Princess Diana because she’s rich. And kill the Headless Horseman.
Fuck, Marry, Kill (2023)
Side note: I was surprised with the religious album title theme that you didn’t spell ‘marry’ here with one ‘r.’ But yeah.
This is funny. The woman who inspired the most songs, the best songs, like all of the top songs that people like about my band, her name is Mary. She has a nickname, but her name is Mary. And so when I initially planned to put out the album I made three different blazers. One said ‘Fuck,’ one said ‘Mary,’ and one said ‘Kill.’ But I said, “That’s creepy bro. You broke up nine years ago. She’s never coming back. This is gonna creep her out. So. Just go with the double ‘r’ because I don’t want to creep her out.” That’s what I said, because we’re still friends and we’re still close and I didn’t want to creep her out.
9. “Buyin’ It” has a story. What is it?
I live the story of “Buyin’ It” every day of my life that I’m on tour. In that song I clearly say you know, “I’ve got fifteen dollars in my pocket, and I have to drive five hundred miles.” It’s just a song about having to make do with what you have. And people, you know, I’m a big gambler in life in a lot of ways, and it’s really about trusting your instincts and not knowing what’s gonna happen, but knowing that if you go into it with a good attitude and you do your best that good things will come. But “Buying’ It” is just about being a hard-knocks woman and having to learn things the hard way.
10. “Down” has one of my favorite lyrics: “Are you turning the cheek to the things you can’t face?” What lyrics of any song you’ve written are you most proud of? Do you have one lyric that you’re just chasing all the time when you write?
I mean, you know, there’s a new song in Holey Water where I say “she’s never gonna tell me lies. She looked me straight in my crooked lies.” If I’m being honest, when I wrote that, it was kind of liberating for me because I’ve always had this lazy eye. It’s always been the first thing everyone sees about me, and it was just kind of liberating to say what everyone’s been thinking; like, “Look at her. She’s got a lazy eye.” And so now every night when I’m singing that song I’m always like “I know it’s here. I know you’re thinking about it.”
Oh, yeah, that was definitely my question eleven, haha: lazy eye, tell me about it.
I have a lazy eye. I was born with a lazy eye. It’s real hard to look cool in pictures. Everything you say looks like it’s a joke, and you’re like, “Why are you laughing?” You wouldn’t stand in front of another disabled person and make weird motions, but some people will stand in front of me and cross their eyes, and I’m like, “You think I think that’s funny?” Yeah, P.C. culture is interesting. But yeah, it’s always been that way. It’s a blessing and a curse, but I love it. It’s not really that this one is lazy, just that this one is extremely hard working.
But yeah, I like “High Class Woman” a lot. Everyone likes “Down” a lot. Which with that one, I was just really pissed off. That’s Midwest culture. That’s how you tell people you’re pissed off: you’re condescending. Like, “Oh, you’ve really got it down, right? You’ve really got this down, don’t you.” And to me, that’s just the biggest ‘fuck you’ when someone’s like ‘Wow. You got it down.’
It’s like ‘bless your heart.’
Yeah, yeah, it’s basically the Midwest version of bless your heart.
Interesting. You came from Illinois right? How was that transition to the South. Like did you feel it?
Hm, it’s so similar. I mean, there are rednecks everywhere. Like Couchie, she’s from Spain, and she’s as redneck as anyone. I say it all the time. She rode dirt bikes through the mountains and shit. She’s nuts. Yeah though, the thing that freaked me out about the South more than the Midwest is that people aren’t genuine here. They don’t care when they ask you how you’ve been. You know, people expect you to sit down and talk when you get that question in the Midwest, but they’ll give you a funny look if you do that here. And they’re not hospitable. They’re not nice. They’re fake polite. Like if someone doesn’t want to be polite in the Midwest then they’re just not fucking polite.
Quickfire
Yeah, so that’s the end of the album questions. Nice! Now for a quickfire round: I’ll ask you to choose between two words, and you try to pick as fast as you can.
- Color TV or black&white? Color.
- 60s or 70s? 70s.
- Mountains or beach? Beach.
- Scream or cry? Cry.
- Cake or pie? Pie.
- Dog or cat? Dog.
- Hot or cold? Hot.
- Biggest turn on? Big butts.
- Which song of yours do you, or would you, screw to? Ain’t Ur Baby.
And lastly — the final question I have to ask every band — what is your best story from the road since you’ve been on this tour?
Hm. I took Hotsauce to get her very first lap dance. Yeah, I love buying people their first lap dance. It’s a gift they’ll never forget. So I got her one in Portland. Found a nice lady. Very professional.
And yeah, I’d say one of my favorite stories is one time when I was in The Bay — and this isn’t crazy, but it’s one of my favorite stories. This woman, she owns a gay bar in Bloomington, Indiana called The Backdoor, and she was in The Bay for this thing called the Folsom Street Fair which is like a leather kind of BDSM festival fair. They have a fair out there and parade and things and it’s just like a week of events. And she came to see us play because we’d played at her bar a couple times. And she was like “how you bitches doing? How’s the road.” It was one of our first West Coast tours, and I was like, “We’re doing good man. This is one of our best tours yet.” Like, this is how bad it was. I was like, “If we make another hundred bucks tonight then we’ll have like a thousand dollars.” Could you imagine going from Nashville all the way to The Bay and only having a thousand dollars. It’s terrifying. But back then, back in 2012, you know, that was a big deal. And she was like, “You only need a hundred bucks kid?” And I said, “Yeah. And it’ll be the most money we’ve ever had on tour.” So she reached down, took out a wad of money, gave me a hundred dollar bill and said, “Now you got your thousand dollars bitch.” And I was like, “Hey, thanks buddy.”
That’s one of my favorite stories. And she took us out to get ice cream sandwiches.
Hotsauce wanders over with a coffee that LG says tastes like it has mildew and suggests another story.
Oh, yeah, I try to keep those stories private. But yeah, we played with this band called L7; they’re a pretty big 90s rock band. I was there, and I was stone cold sober, so this is true. But my band got shit-face blasted after the show, which is fine, they can do that, it’s not a big deal. But you know, I wasn’t gonna go backstage unless L7 invited us, and they did, and then as we went back there I realized how shit-faced my band was, and so I told this one girl, “Do not embarrass me in front of L7. Like no matter what you do, do not embarrass me.” And she looked at me like wahhhh, wahhhh. And the lead singer came out and was like let’s get a picture together, and I was like yeah, great. And then literally my drummer stands on an amp so she can be like over us in the picture. This bitch falls, off the amp, directly onto the 65 year old rocker chick. I was just mortified. Thankfully she does yoga, so she had her shit together.
Definitely my favorite interview I’ve ever done, this wraps up our time together. The band gave a mystical performance that night with reality-inducing interludes about boob soap, hating Donald Trump, and what an Oxford strip club would be called. Follow their Instagram here to see them in person (they might not be sappy performative activists, but they are one-hundred percent cool performance artists), and follow their Spotify here if you can’t make it in person just quite yet.
If you guys are reading this, I had a great time. See you next time you come around (I mean, you gotta come back now. I’ll need a round two). Good luck and Hotty Toddy!
