Engaged? Congratulations! Here’s Why You Can’t Get Married For Two Years…
So you’ve gone ahead and decided to spend the rest of your life with that someone special…that’s fantastic! Congratulations. There’s just one small problem, we’re in the middle of a worldwide pandemic and you can’t get married!
What does this pandemic do to your plans? Unfortunately, plenty.
You wanted to have that very special destination ceremony and reception, where all of your friends and family can fly in from all over the world. Problem — airlines are scarcely being used.
You wanted to stay in that exotic locale with the beachfront sand and twenty-four hour room service. Problem — hotels are not booking guests. You booked that wedding venue that your cousin and her husband booked for their ceremony because you thought it was spectacular! Problem — it has been shut down now for a couple of months and won’t re-open until the fall.
Arrrrgggh!
You get the idea, it’s a new world we live in and unfortunately for those wanting to get married in front of friends and family at some five-star oversees resort, they will now have to wait to do so. Now, you could just go ahead and get married with only a ‘Justice of the Peace’ and your Maid of Honor and Best Man in attendance. Of course, the wedding photos of you and your betrothed dawning masks probably isn’t necessarily the best look for your wedding album.
After putting on several hundred weddings in my career, I must tell you that it doesn’t necessarily break my heart not hearing Etta James’ “At Last” bellowing over the DJ’s sound system for the couples’ first dance. And with the current state of affairs in the world it may be quite some time, before we can all witness the sweet daddy daughter dance again — unless we all fashion on our masks and stay six feet apart. Oh darn!
But having said that, what are social events going to look like in the future?
I hasten to say that we will never get to the point we once were unless a vaccine or cure is found for this disease — it’s risky and just too deadly.
A wedding can be regarded as the best event in your life, but this year many will need to put it on hold, and rightly so. Weddings in particular are an integral part of a resort or venue, and not having them has not only hurt the resort and hotel industry, it hurts the couples looking to solidify their relationship and progress forward from their engagement. Think of all the weddings cancelled this summer alone. Millions of travel plans and reservations — poof — vanishing into thin air.
So what’s the timeline? When will things get back to normal? Nobody knows. I think it’s clear, however, that social gatherings such as weddings will definitely be on hold for a while.
Let us speculate for a moment in saying that you’d like to get married next spring in Italy. First, would you feel comfortable getting on a plane? Yes? Ok… Second, how would you feel going to a country where the outbreak was most severe and could flare up again at any time? Not so comfortable, especially since people will be gathering from around the world in your honor. Are any of them sick? Not yet, but because they attend your wedding they sit next to cousin Giselle from Sweden who doesn’t speak any English and doesn’t know she’s sick as she doesn’t show any symptoms, but passes the virus on anyway…to several individuals. How guilty do you feel now? This scenario could be anywhere in the world at any time over the next year. And with confidence of creating a vaccine at an uncertain level worldwide, it may be wishful thinking that social events aren’t even entertained of again until 2022.
With the technological advances of today’s society, we can attend anything online — a meeting, a sporting event, a doctor’s appointment — and now family engagements such as weddings may be the next domino to fall. Perhaps the episode of Friends where Phoebe attends Ross and Emily’s wedding via phone, was just the beginning. Attending a wedding virtually may be the way of the future for some attendees. Putting aside the emotional tie to the couple, virtual attendees would help save money on travel, meals and liquor consumption by your Uncle Bob who camps at the bar for two reasons: to hit on the bartender and to consume as much alcohol as he can because it’s an ‘open’ bar.
Throughout history, many crises around the globe have forced society to make ‘adjustments’, and adapt. The Great Depression, 9/11 and Asian Tsunamis are just some recent events over the past one hundred years, that have re-shaped our world, and given us pause on how we used to do things. Of course, this virus has given us a challenge unseen before in modern times, and will only help us build a stronger immunity to these future health challenges.
If you’re a newly engaged couple, celebrate your love but you’ll need to place the public celebration on hold for a bit. In the meantime, plan your big day two ways: virtual and non-virtual. Have an idea of what your wedding will look like based upon how the world has been re-shaped. Remember, adapting to the crisis will only make us stronger — it will make your marriage stronger too.
