Provocation: Trump bans (bannons? Get it?) trans people from the military

Rant: Okay Log Cabin Republicans and other equally deluded LGBTQ republicans, tell me again how Trump is YOUR president, how he’s going to fight for people like you and welcome you into the party with open arms (and tiny hands)?

But honestly you’re mostly all white men with a relatively large amount of privilege and a relatively large amount of hatred for trans people and anyone else who’s not traditionally gay (lol), and if somehow choosing Mike pro-conversion-therapy Pence as his VP wasn’t the first sign to you that Trump is not and never will care for you outside of bragging rights (I have gay friends! They love me! They say my…hands…are very large and manly!) and sound bites, then nothing will sway you from your absurd belief that there is ANY way to separate Conservativism from fundamentalist Christianity and the homophobia that it demands of its true believers. Also Bannon is the new Cheney aka Puppet Master, and you can hardly get more virulently homophobic than building a media platform empire in order to bash gay people.

Caveat: there’s nothing wrong with being LGBT and being a fiscal conservative, and/or a proponent of small federal government (of which, ironically, liberals are finally seeing some benefits). However you’re going to need to start a new party that supports those values along with social liberalism because the defining feature of the new Right is being anti-sex and hardline Christian values in the form of homophobia, transphobia, Islamaphobia, and misogyny.

To be a good Conservative today (synonymous with good Christian) you must: oppose abortion but also oppose sex-ed and contraception access that reduces abortion rates, oppose gay marriage (not because you hate the gays but because marriage is a traditional Christian union that totally doesn’t exist on a government level or in other religions or among atheists…), oppose unions and livable minimum wages and other middle-class socialist-sounding policy, and orgasm to thoughts of guns, oil rigs dotting the landscape, and increased defense spending aka bombing Muslim nations. Oh and also oppose Constitutionalism in favor of freedom for Christians to discriminate. Oh and use the word ‘cuck’ whenever someone advocates for being ‘PC’ aka not intentionally offensive and rude, with no sense of the irony of a conservative Christian using kink lingo in everyday speech. OH and if you’re not wealthy, voting against your own best interests.