Secrets of Dumbledore — These movies keep getting dull

The title makes no sense. source

Diminishing returns.

The first time I heard about it, was in my first month of my 2 year residential MBA program. This super cool economics professor was talking about it. He used the example of a lemonade or lemon juice that we make at home, in India during hot summers.

Even today, millions of Indians who cannot afford ice cold water, make ‘nimbu juice’, to get respite from sweltering heat.

He explained, the very first cup of lemon juice gives the most relaxation from thirst, heat and is the most joyful. The second one, slightly less but still enjoyable. The 3rd and 4th…and eventually, the 5th cup, is no different than drinking regular water.

Franchises suffer from this a lot. The MCU is by far the most amazing franchise in the world. Yet, I had to force myself to sit through Endgame just to finish the story. Since then, I have not watched any of the MCU offerings including the Disney Plus shows. It’s like the 5th cup of lemon juice.

Endgame was so exhausting, I have decided to skip all future MCU movies, because I cannot stomach that universe or its characters anymore.

The first time I was introduced to the world of Harry Potter was in 2005. I was home sick due to a severe nose problem (which later required a surgery), and my parents got me a bunch of movie box sets to sit and watch. One of them was Harry Potter. By 2005, 3 harry potter movies had been released. I had heard of them but magic movies never appealed to me.

I am more of a sci-fi guy. So, after finishing all the other movies in the movie drawer, as a last resort, I put the Harry Potter 1 DVD into the player. The concept of a young boy living under a cupboard, without parents and abusive uncle and aunt, immediately hooked me. It just so happens that I was also removed from my still alive parents, forced to live with an extremely abusive uncle and aunt for six years of my childhood.

And, just like harry potter, the only place I was happy, was at school. I felt like harry potter! I watched all three movies at once. Then, I was told that the books have already been published. I was already a long time fan of book reading. I bought the 4th book to continue the story from the movies. I finished it in a few days. Then, I bought the 5th and the 6th book and finished them too.

The Harry Potter books are awesome. The movies are awesome too, although the final book (and the final two movies) were a drag. When Voldemort finally died, I was relieved! I was like, thank god this series and the movies are over.

Ending Fatigue had set in.

Then, expectedly, came the inevitable spin offs. Of all the things, Rowling and WB could conjure, they choose go with some unknown, unpopular character of Newt Scamander. I don't even remember him! Harry Potter universe is filled with colorful characters.

  1. They could have made a villain protagonist series on Voldemort.
  2. They could have made an action movie about Alastor Mad Eye Moody’s life as a Death Eater during the first Wizarding War.
  3. They could have made movies about the school years of James and Lilly Potter, along with focus on young Snape, young Sirius Black and so on.

Why this, weird, unlikable beast taming guy! I had to force through Fantastic Beasts 1. At the end, I knew this new series was going to evolve badly. Rowling hasn’t written anything good since the Harry Potter series. The seventh is still the worst book in the franchise. She was already losing her touch.

I even picked up her The Casual Vacancy book when it was released. I paid full price for it, and threw it away after reading two chapters. It was so dull. She has lost it man.

That’s okay. She is a billionaire. She could just chill.

But, no, we have to sit through even more badly written Wizarding World movies. The second Fantastic Beasts movie looks good, but, it suffers the same problem that Wonder Woman 1984 does. There are so many nonsensical plot points, too many characters, threads that go nowhere.

As a long time Harry Potter fan, you know JK Rowling. In the original Harry books, you know that the author is in complete control of the story (except for the 7th book, which sucks). Everything falls in place, spread over 7 books. The plot points, the turns and twist, character actions, motivations and conclusions.

It’s like watching a sports person in her prime. Then, the sports person gets old, and the inevitable decline in form sets in. For instance, you look at Formula 1. Alonso is still driving, but he’s always in the end of the race results. This is the guy who won the championship. Now is happy to be at the bottom.

It’s an odd thing to see that.

Perhaps, the same thing has happened with Rowling. Perhaps she is unaware that she is no longer as creative as she used to be. Now, we have the 3rd movie, which has the most unimaginative tile.

‘Secrets of Dumbledore’

Compare this with, ‘Prisoner of Azkaban’…’Goblet of Fire’…these are super cool titles.

Right now, the Fantastic Beast series is like a broken down ship. Everybody involved is probably feeling it too. I remember watching ‘Die Another Day’, and I was only a kid. Still, I could feel like Brosnan was not happy with the movie. The story seemed half baked, everything appeared rushed.

I got the same feeling, again, when watching ‘Spectre’, with Daniel Craig looking bored. I cannot wait to see him, even more bored, in the new bond movie when it shows up on streaming.

Final Note

Ultimately, I don’t know why they wont just end this series. Save the embarrassment or the financial losses.

WB could just reboot Harry Potter, which would be far more watchable than whatever lame secrets that will be reveled to loud, disappointing groans next year.

I work as a full time freelance coding tutor. Hire me at UpWork or Fiverr. My personal website is here.

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