How Do You Deal With An Indecisive Partner?

You are constantly frustrated because you have an indecisive partner. Here’s why they are that way and how you can deal with it so your life is easier.

Daley Burke
The Savanna Post
5 min readMar 27, 2023

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One of the key features of a healthy relationship is making plans to achieve a goal. However, it might be hard to achieve this if both partners are not on the same page. When one partner is particular about something and the other is unsure, it can cause conflict.

Dealing with an indecisive partner is a lot of work because you need to be patient, loving, and understanding. If you are struggling with how to deal with an indecisive partner, this article is for you.

What is the meaning of indecisiveness in a relationship?

To be indecisive in a relationship means not having the willpower to make decisions and stand by them. Someone indecisive can take a long time to decide on something due to fear of the unknown, the fear of failure, laziness, fear of being responsible, etc.

Therefore, indecisiveness can be a drawback in the relationship, and it can strain the other partner who is more decisive.

What makes a partner indecisive?

One of the reasons for being indecisive is the fear of making the wrong decision. No one wants to decide on something and later find out they were wrong. Therefore, some people might be reluctant to make such decisions in the first place.

On the other hand, some partners would stick to one decision after several findings and brainstorming sessions. Some people can also be worried about the consequence of succeeding, so making decisions might be difficult for them.

How To Deal with an Indecisive Partner

Having an indecisive partner can be tiring and frustrating. This is because they find it hard to be sure of anything. They can make some promises today and not follow through the next day. If you want to know how to deal with an indecisive partner, here are some tips to help you.

1. Tell them that indecision is a decision

Really, when you don’t make a choice, you are making one. If you cannot choose between eating out or cooking a homemade meal, you will likely end up eating at home, which is a choice by default. Indecision is a choice, so let your partner know how this is affecting your relationship and what you believe to be true about indecisiveness.

Your partner may realize how intelligent you are for coming up with this insight, and the secret is that you can say it came from you! Steal the idea and let them know you’d prefer it if they’d start making more decisions in the relationship rather than letting things just sit — undecided. Explain how that makes you feel (afraid, uneasy, annoyed, etc.).

2. Ask them to trust their gut

Sometimes, you just need to remind your partner that their intuition is usually right (even if that is not the case in most circumstances). If you help them feel more confident about their ability to make decisions, you have a greater chance of them making decisions in the future. They will soon be able to look at a choice and make the right one — fast!

3. Give them time to decide

Sometimes, you just need to have a little patience. Realize that your relationship is unique with this individual. Maybe he or she has this particular flaw but many other great attributes. As you practice patience and understanding with your partner, be sure to count the blessings you have with this person. What good have they brought you?

If you think about their strengths, you will be less likely to judge them at this time. Just give them any time that they ask for or seem to need to make the decision at hand. Being understanding will help your relationship.

4. Stimulate their mental capacity

When it comes to indecisive people relationships, you need to be careful not to mistake this for manipulation.

Sometimes, an indecisive girlfriend or boyfriend might not have the mental strength to brainstorm on making some crucial decisions. Therefore, you can help them by posing important questions that help them decide faster.

5. Give them space to think things over

We mentioned giving your partner time to think things over, but have you thought about letting them sit with it. Maybe go for a walk or hit the mall to do some shopping. Whatever you decide to do — just give them space to have plenty of room for their thoughts and creative thinking process.

6. Build their confidence in the relationship

Let your partner know that you do not consider this to be a reason to break up but that it is an issue. If you secure their confidence in your relationship, they will be more sure of themselves when making decisions in the future. It’s a great thing — to be a part of the increase in someone’s self-worth or self-esteem!

7. Give them a deadline

When you are frustrated by your indecisive partner, then sometimes you just need to give them a deadline.

Be firm and tell them if they don’t come up with a decision by a certain day and time, then there will be consequences. Or, you could tell them that you will just make the decision for them. That will help their decision-making along.

8. Have healthy communication

When you get angry with your indecisive partner, you have to watch yourself to make sure that you don’t break down the communication between the two of you.

Try to avoid yelling, screaming, or name-calling regardless of how frustrated you feel. Keep the conversations logical and healthy.

9. Don’t expect them to change

If you see your indecisive partner making progress, you shouldn’t expect too much. They probably won’t magically change into a person who is good at making decisions.

So, don’t get your hopes up and have expectations that are too high. If you do, you might get disappointed a lot. So, you will have to be patient with them.

10. Decide if you can continue this in the long run

If you’ve tried even half of the items on this list, you are probably exhausted and sick of thinking about the things your partner was having trouble deciding upon. Is this going to work in the long run? Can you be with someone who cannot make up his or her mind? Will this forever cause you stress? It may be time to cut ties if you cannot handle this.

Should you stay with an indecisive partner?

This is a question that only you can answer. However, it only comes down to one thing — how is your partner’s indecisiveness affecting your life?

If it’s in a negative way, then you might want to reconsider the relationship. But if it doesn’t bother you too much, then you might want to stay and work it out.

But don’t mistake indecisiveness as a personality disorder. There are extreme cases, but that can hardly be said for someone who just isn’t confident about how they decide things.

Instead, treat this like you would any obstacle in your relationship. Discuss it, work on it together and do your best to solve the issue with your partner.

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Daley Burke
The Savanna Post

Telling it how it is, whilst keeping that typical sense of humor.