How To Text A Girl After You Get Her Number: 10+ Proven Texts To Send
You might think that the biggest challenge was getting her number and I hate to break it to you but that was only half the battle.
What you text a girl right after getting her number will affect your chances with her, so it’s important that you send the right text.
This may be a little tricky because you don’t want to appear too eager but you don’t want to sound boring at the same time.
Thinking of that perfect message can be stressful, but don’t worry I got you!
How Long After Getting Her Number Should You Text Her?
This is a question that people are often not sure about and can mess up. Taking too long to text a girl after you get her number can mess up your chances completely.
It may cause her to lose interest altogether. The longer you wait, the higher the chances that she’ll forget about you. That being said, at the same time, you don’t want to seem too needy either.
While you may have heard of the three-day rule, which basically states that you should text a girl three days after getting her number, it doesn’t hold value anymore.
So, how long after getting her number should you text her?
Times have changed and girls’ interest and attention don’t last for very long anymore. If you want to act, you gotta act quick! It is ideal to do it within 24 hours when you’re still fresh in her mind.
What to Do Before Texting a Girl and After Getting Her Number
I never understood the term, “it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it” until I became good with women. You can literally say the same thing to the same woman and get two different results just cause you changed the mindset behind those words.
I always thought that in order to charm a girl, you should come up with the perfect opener until I saw guys walking up to girls with nothing but “hi” and a huge load of confidence.
Now, I get away with things most guys can’t say to girls just cause I’m saying them with confidence. And, my texts are so slick I often catch myself saying, “OMG, that was f**** awesome.”
Not because I’m verbally gifted — well, sometimes I think I am — but because I text/talk with the right frame of mind, so everything flows just naturally. It’s how you say it, not what, that makes a girl like you. And it all starts with these mindsets:
Text Mindset #1: Assume she likes you until proven otherwise
“She said yes when she could’ve said no.”
Remember that line from Hitch?
She could’ve said no, given you a fake number, ghosted you, blocked you or told you to F off… But she didn’t.
So you’re better off assuming she likes you until proven the opposite. This will allow you to be bold and text her without worrying about saying the wrong thing.
As a result:
- If she likes you: she will get on board quickly
- If she doesn’t: she will tell you right away and stop wasting your time
Either way, you’re always winning.
Text Mindset #2: You’re good enough for her (As long as you’re improving)
Let’s be real; you can’t tell yourself that this hot girl is equal to you if you haven’t dated a girl of her caliber in years. Your mind won’t believe it…
Still, you want to see yourself in a better light in order to not put her on a pedestal and lose her. So you can use these facts/questions to remind yourself of your true value.
Fact #1: You’re a catch to most girls if you always work on yourself — Most men — and women — don’t work on themselves or take risks. And the fact that you always try to get better makes you a catch to so many hot women out there. Do you exercise, read frequently, whine less and work more?
You’re a catch.
Do you try to get better with the ladies and improve your verbal/texting skills?
You’re a catch.
Are you good in bed and can give her the time of her life?
You’re a catch.
Most men, or women, don’t walk the path. Only one or two percent of them do, and if you’re among them, then you, my fellow love machine, are a catch.
Fact #2: The value battle isn’t always won by the person with the highest value — When it comes to the perception of value, the man who’s convinced he has the highest value will win over the man brings more to the table. So if you’re really convinced you’re good enough, she will think you are. It all starts within you.
Text Mindset #3: I’m not sold, yet
“Girl, you’re cute but I’m not sold yet.”
I often say it to girls if they try to act out on a first date or before we meet. That’s the frame you should come from. She should have more going on with her beyond her looks.
I totally understand that some guys have been dreaming of that hot girlfriend for years. Who doesn’t? Still, you should never qualify a girl solely on her looks.
Those who are experienced with women know that looks is one of many traits a woman must have to be with them. They must like her, of course, but she must also have other good qualities: kindness, humor, ambition…etc
And to be honest, there are a lot of women like that. And the girl you’re texting is just a drop in the ocean.
She can be really special, but she’s not a rare breed. If she doesn’t like you, it’s cool, and if she likes you, it’s also cool.
It’s called indifference.
Now, get a seat and get ready to munch on knowledge because I will be discussing these principles with sample texts you can send or modify to help you set up that date.
How to Write the First Text
When it comes to the first text, there are rules worth following that help you maintain social etiquette and keep the conversation going. Achieving both with one text is how you guarantee a reply and a future date.
1. Use the connection — The most important thing you want to achieve with the first text is driving their curiosity and captivating their attention. That is why your connection is a very useful resource. It is a memory unique to both of you. Crafting the text in a way that reminds them of that memory instantly establishes you in their mind. For instance, if you met after you spilled coffee on them, you could send a text saying,
“At least on here, I don’t have to burn you with coffee to start a conversation.”
2. Keep things short — When you write the first text, make it short. It doesn’t matter if you are a long-paragraph texter. The shorter the text, the sharper the mind-captivating effect. Also, keep it simple. They should be able to grasp the point of the text at a glance. This mostly refers to grammar and spelling.
3. Don’t be formal or boring — In certain moments, a standard “Hello” or “Hey, [her name]” is enough to get the ball rolling. Although they are boring, they are enough. But these moments are usually a few minutes or a couple of hours after collecting the number. Once enough time has passed, you need a message with personality to spark their interest. The same thing goes for formal sentences. Ditch them and save the formalities for your boss or parents. Always keep things light and casual.
What To Text Immediately After Getting The Number (In Person or Online)
Here are some examples of what to text immediately after getting her number;
5. “Hey (her name), nice to meet you” — A bland simple text like this is a nice little way to get the text chain started. When you got their number, you established your interest in them. So there is no need for you to do it again via text so soon. Additionally, it is a non-committal way to gauge if they are interested in you or if they were just being nice when they shared their number. If their response is encouraging, you can then proceed normally.
6. “I know am breaking code by not waiting at least 24 hours, but I couldn’t wait to talk to you” — Humor is a cheat code for the first message to someone after getting their number. Acknowledging the subversion of the texting rule is a fun way to break the ice without thinking too much. It is also a cool way to stay in control of the conversation, helping you maintain the adrenaline rush from asking her out.
7. “Let the flirty texts begin” — Being inappropriate may be off the table, but you can still spark their imagination with this line. It will make them think about the future with you, and that has a way of making you the first thing on their mind ASAP. At the very least, you will get a smile out of them and set the tone for what dating would look like.
Texts If You Got The Number In Person
Knowing what to text someone after getting their number most times comes down to how you got their number. All of these endless possible scenarios can be summarized into two categories — in person and virtually.
It is more straightforward to figure out the first text when you meet in person. The shared experience provides significant material to mine for text messages.
But not every in-person meeting is that exciting, which means coming up with something more lively. This is also applicable if it has been days or weeks since you collected their number.
8. “Want to know the first thing I thought when I saw you?” — If there is one thing the news media get right, it is the power of clickbait. By dangling a message that provokes a reaction, you don’t have to worry that they won’t respond. Human curiosity guarantees that they will. Another great thing about this text or its variation is there are at least two follow-up lines — what a nice way to ease your way into that chat.
9. “What question would you have liked me to ask last night that I didn’t?”— Open-ended questions that force the reader to think about their answer help you break from overused interview questions. Instead of “what do you do for a living” or “where are you from,” dig more into your connection. A text like this will make it unlikely for them to forget you, and it will keep both of you engaged for a while.
10. “You won’t believe what just happened” — Nothing exceptional even has to happen. You only need to use it to grab their attention and let your chemistry and creativity do the rest. Whatever explanation you choose to go with, though, should at least keep them excited. The last thing you want to do is get their mind racing early into the chat and then let it fizzle unremarkably shortly after.
11. “It’s too bad you had to leave. We didn’t have time to make out.” — If you’re brave when it comes to flirting, say something bold like this.
12. “It was nice to see you today. We should hang out more often don’t you think?” — There’s nothing wrong with being blunt. If you want to ask her out, then go for it!
If you start your conversation by using one of these lines, it’ll make her want to hear more from you.
