Writing

How Writers Torture Themselves (& How To Stop)

Writers, me included, must be nutcases. We torture ourselves to give birth to our creations. How we do that, why, and how to stop this — that’s what this article is all about.

It all starts with the shiny new idea. It pops up, in the back of my brain, preferably in the middle of the night. Being a dutiful writer, I get up. I could keep a notebook at my bedside, but no, I need to walk over to my desk, rummage through my drawer, and find a notebook. Back to bed.

Do I go back to sleep? No. I toss and turn until sunrise, and with very dark circles under my eyes, I get up to go to my day job. I need to spend hours and hours doing a job that pays my bills. Does it feed my desire? My vocation? No.

The writer in me is let out to play once I come home, feed my family, do the ironing and the dishes, check my kids’ homework, and talk to my partner.

Finally, with the house snoring gently, I get to do what I truly want to. I take my shiny idea and present it to my computer. All typed up, it does lose a bit of lustre. I roll up my sleeves and start hammering away, shaping and reshaping it into a poem or a story. That torture is my daily routine. Sound familiar?

As if that isn’t strenuous enough, here are some more ways in which writers torture themselves and how I try to escape that craziness.

5 Tortures & 5 Tips

Let’s confront the myths that torture writers with some pro tips.

1. Myth: Create terrible working conditions.

As a writer, I use every spare minute to write. That means I scribble on the back of my shopping list while I wait my turn at the cheese counter in the supermarket. On bus rides, I use bus tickets to create sub-plots for my short stories until I get off. During my lunch break, I take extra napkins to make wild drawings of escalating events for my new novel.

Finally, I am exhausted because I haven’t had time to catch my breath. The pockets of my jacket are stuffed with titbits of ideas, and very few of them are good. Why? Because I didn’t have any time to relax. My mind is in a constant hamster wheel. We all know that no hamster has ever published a bestseller.

Pro Tip: Devote some of your best time to your writing.

Find out when you are most productive and see what you can set aside for your vocation.

2. Myth: Writing must be done in the ivory tower.

Don’t tell anyone about your writing until you can brag with a full-time writing job. Live a life in secrecy until you receive the Nobel Prize. If you’re not a published writer, then you’re no good anyway.

That’s self-isolation and shame! Any psychologist knows this is not a good combo. It’s a fool-proof path to depression.

Pro Tip: Don’t be ashamed of what you love.

If you want to discuss your favourite pastime, do it! Other people talk about playing darts, for example. Do we expect them to be world champions? No.

Talking about your writing will make you feel good. After all, it’s your favourite activity!

How will you ever find other writers if you never talk about what’s dear to you? Writers need other writers to talk to, learn from, and nourish each other’s writing. Only like-minded people will help you to keep going when the going gets tough. You won’t ever find your tribe when you lock yourself up.

3. Myth: Your worth is defined by your success.

To be a writer, you must be published, right? Unless your writing isn’t in print, and in the bookstore, you are not a writer. As a writer, you must have accomplished something bound in leather, and at least over a two hundred pages. Writers must be famous.

Pro Tip: To be a writer, you must write. That’s all.

Writing is an activity. It’s enough to write regularly to call yourself a writer. That’s all. All that talk about bestsellers is setting the bar too high. You might never attain it.

Getting published is a very high goal. Once you learn about the publishing process, you’ll find out that your talent as a writer isn’t enough to get you published. There are so many factors, and luck does play a big role.

4. Myth: Diamonds are shaped by pressure.

Writers are shaped by deadlines. Deadlines are our thumbscrews. A little pressure can’t hurt, right? After all, our writing is supposed to show our blood, sweat, and tears. Only that kind of suffering will create the authenticity we crave. So, don’t forget to try the hardest thing first. If you’ve always wanted to write a novel, why not write a novel?

All that pressure, all these constant deadlines cause anxiety. Especially if they’re so tight that nobody can meet them. Yes, we do need a bit of pressure. But not the medieval kind! Instruments of torture just get people injured and killed. Human beings aren’t diamonds!

Pro Tip: Learn how to set helpful deadlines and healthy expectations.

Yes, we need deadlines, or we’ll twiddle our thumbs all day. But they need to be realistic. Just like our expectations.

Use the advice you give your children when they tackle a test in school. Start with the easiest task. Work your way up. Start with some flash fiction maybe, or a short story. Learn your craft. Then you’ll have the skill to tackle your novel.

5. Myth: True talent will always show.

If you’re meant to be a writer, you will be. Talent doesn’t need learning. Who needs lengthy writing classes? Who needs to read up on plot structure, character development, or the latest trends in poetic verse? If you’ve got what it takes, you’ll do it with a sleight of hand. If not, it’s just not meant to be.

Pro Tip: Discipline beats talent every time.

The danger in this belief in talent is that there’s some truth in it. Yes, talent will always show. But without endless exercising of your writing muscles, even talent won’t get you far. Any athlete, any musician, any painter will tell you the same thing. You must learn your craft. There are no shortcuts. Regular exercises are necessary.

The Take-Away

The writing process can be torture. Many writers don’t enjoy it; they enjoy the result of having written. Famous writer Douglas Adams is one of them. That’s not the healthiest attitude. If you learn to love the journey, then I promise you the process of writing will be much more enjoyable.